


Between Two Lungs

by Emilia676



Category: Thor (Movies), Thor (Movies) RPF
Genre: Intersex Loki, M/M, Pre-Canon, au aspect, but also non intersex loki, but not an au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-10
Updated: 2015-09-22
Packaged: 2018-04-13 14:18:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 30,727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4525236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emilia676/pseuds/Emilia676
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For fun, Thor and Loki take a trip to Earth, stripped of their memories of their real lives in Asgard. It is meant to bring the brothers closer, though neither anticipated how close that would be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to Nora (or umakoo) for being my beta; I appreciate all your help so much and it is a pleasure getting to know you!
> 
> This fic was originally inspired by the song "Sangria" by Blake Shelton (though there are absolutely no elements of country music lol). 
> 
> I should be able to update at least once a week. Feedback is, of course, appreciated!
> 
> I have a tumblr account as emilybailey6

“Yield, Thor, or have you lost your wits as well as your footing?”

Thor found that he could neither argue with the sharp, cool blade pressed just beneath his jaw, nor with the sooty grin that had overtaken Sif’s face.

“I yield,” Thor admitted, a little breathless from having just collided unexpectedly with the ground. It was hard but pleasantly chilling against his skin – a result of their sparring at night – and Thor was nearly loathe to accept Sif’s offered hand as he was helped into a standing position.

Volstagg, Fandral, and Hogun approached their friends in the ring, their cheers filling the otherwise silent arena.

“You too often forget the power of a woman’s touch, Thor!” called Fandral as he clapped in Sif’s direction.

Sif laughed, obviously pleased with herself. Her white teeth gleamed in the light of the fire pits surrounding the area.

Thor laughed as well. “It is only in battle that I make such mistakes, my friend.”

“Ah yes, well, the bedroom is another matter entirely.” The comment earned Fandral a punch to his arm from Sif. It amused Thor that Fandral raised his other hand to massage the sore spot when Sif turned her attention to the rest of the group.

“So,” Sif began, “who is next?”

“What about Loki?” Volstagg suggested, his head turned and voice raised.

The others turned toward the stands where an audience might be seated in the day. Loki sat in the lower seats closer to the ground, perhaps for a better view, though there was a scroll in his lap and a glowing orb hovering over it. He looked up upon hearing his name.

Thor smiled; it had become more and more seldom that Loki joined them for sparring, even if it was only to observe. “How long have you been with us, brother? I did not notice your arrival.”

At that, Loki’s mouth formed a small smile. “Not long. I could not help but hear shouting from my balcony.” The smile grew. “And I could not resist staying to see if Sif would best Asgard’s finest warrior.”

Thor felt his smile vanish. “I did not realize we were too loud.” He hoped that they hadn’t woken anyone by being too rowdy with their sport, harmless as it was.

Loki cocked his head in the direction of the soft breeze, his dark hair brushing against his jaw and neck. It called to Thor’s mind a raven’s feathers, sleek against pale skin. “Worry not, brother, I placed a silencing charm around the grounds. You may all bellow as freely as you wish.”

Thor relaxed at that. He felt warmth for his brother, who always seemed to anticipate Thor’s concerns even before he did himself. “Thank you.”

“Yes, thank you, Loki, it is refreshing to see that your tricks are not all for pranks!” said Fandral.

Loki’s own chuckle joined the others’. He stood, maintaining an air of regality about him even in his simpler clothing. With a quick hand motion, both the scroll and the orb disappeared.

“Indeed,” replied Loki, a smirk in place of the earlier smile. “To answer Volstagg, perhaps another time. And I do hope you find this next trick entirely refreshing, Fandral.”

With that, Loki disappeared himself. After a few moments of waiting, Thor and his friends were left staring at one another in confusion when no further magic came that they could see. Eventually, Hogun and Volstagg decided to spar. They faced one another, weapons ready. Just as Fandral began the count for them to begin, all of the fire pits went out without warning. Not only that, but there was some sort of barrier blocking the light of the stars, as well. They were in total darkness.

“Loki!” called Fandral, though everyone knew that Loki was long gone.

“Call for someone to light the fire!” said Volstagg. Fandral did as he suggested; no one came.

“I doubt that Loki lifted his silencing charm,” offered Hogun, and Fandral let out an annoyed groan.

“This is as refreshing as a hug from a Jotun, Loki!”

Thor could not help his answering laughter. “You all but asked for this!”

***

Thor knocked lightly upon the doors leading to Loki’s rooms. Rather than receiving an answer, one of the doors simply unlatched, allowing for Thor’s entrance.

Stepping inside, Thor quietly shut the door behind him even though there was no real need for silence. Thor usually found himself behaving less boisterously in the company of his brother when it was only the two of them (something he did only for Loki and their mother, when Thor gave the matter thought).

He found Loki lounging across his bed on his back. He held his hands above him, entertaining himself by forming short bursts of fire of all colors. They were rather beautiful, as though Loki pulled the fire somehow from the bifrost itself.

“To what do I owe the pleasure, brother?” Though the words might sound dry to others, Thor could see the smile pulling at Loki’s lips.

Thor smiled and came closer. “I would ask you to end your trickery surrounding the sparring grounds.”

At that, Loki laughed outright and sat up, the fire gone. This close, Thor could see the playfulness stirring in Loki’s green, green eyes. It made him happy to see Loki enjoy himself in anything, even at his own expense.

“Surely Fandral has enough experience feeling his way through complete darkness – ah, I should have guessed your means of escape,” Loki said as he noticed Mjolnir hanging loosely in Thor’s hand.

Thor had simply called Mjolnir, catching her a little less gracefully than if he had been able to see (he told himself that he would practice this later, and would probably end up feeling grateful to Loki for unintentionally alerting him to it). He had told his friends to stay put until he had found Loki in order to let them see again.

“Yes, but not everyone is as fortunate,” Thor answered, “so I thought you might take pity on our friends before they unwittingly harm themselves or each other.”

“Very well.” Loki made a short series of hand gestures, entirely foreign to Thor, looking bored as he did so. “There. It is done. It was only fun, Thor.”

Thor grinned. “I am aware. Thank you, brother.”

Loki dramatically made to bow as if he were standing. “No thanks are needed. I am always at the service of the _mighty Thor_.”

They both laughed. Thor always felt a little ridiculous when anyone referred to him as such. He was sure that Loki knew this because he made every effort to tease Thor when the opportunity arose. When they were left in silence again, Thor knew that it was an appropriate moment to bid Loki good night. However, Thor was not tired and so he found himself lingering instead.

Loki waited a moment or two before speaking again. “Are there other matters on which you would speak?”

Thor’s lips parted, but paused before asking, “May I sit with you?” He could not be certain of the surprise he thought to be on Loki’s face; Thor often wondered if he imagined the emotions he witnessed passing across Loki, fleeting as they tended to be.

Still, Loki moved over on his bed as though to make room for Thor when there was already plenty of space. Thor placed Mjolnir gently on the floor before making his way to settle near Loki. He rested against the headboard and allowed his legs to stretch out. Finally relaxed, Thor let his gaze fall among various objects in the room. Over the years, Loki had acquired numerous objects as he became more refined in his practice of seidr. There were but a few for which Thor knew the purpose.

“Do you really need to clutter your room so?” Thor asked.

Loki glanced around his room and snickered. “It is much preferred to the barren atmosphere of your chambers.”

Thor laughed softly, his eyes still roaming. Some of the items he knew the story behind the acquisition. In fact, Thor had aided Loki many times to retrieve this or that object – none of which held any importance for Thor, but he would go along with nearly anything Loki put them to if it meant a chance to see his brother’s happiness when the item was finally in their possession. However, as Loki became more and more skilled, he required Thor’s help less and less. It was not without sadness (even a longing) that Thor realized Loki had not asked for his help in such matters in a rather long time.

“Do you remember,” Loki started, pulling Thor from his thoughts, “when you nearly cost me my dragon’s blood because you mistook it for potion, and traded it with a dwarf for an ugly sword?”

“The sword was a very fine one, brother, and I remember very well that in order to gain back the blood, the dwarf took not only the sword back but most of my hair!”

Loki seemed unable to stop the bark of laughter that followed, and the sound greatly pleased Thor.

From there, the two siblings fell into an easy flow of conversation as they brought up events and mishaps of centuries past. Thor was surprised at times when Loki would mention something that he had not thought on for years, even a century. But that was a core difference between the two: Thor tended to live more in the moment while Loki seemed ever more lost in thought. Thor often wished that Loki was as open with him as he was with Loki.

“I must say, brother,” Loki drawled, “your memory is appalling as ever.”

They had both slid down from the head board, lying on their backs. The first traces of morning light had begun to creep across the floor. Thor tried to remember the last time they had stayed up talking like this.

_It has been too long_ , he thought.

“That is why I trust you the most in all things. You excel where I am lacking.” Thor looked at Loki as he spoke. He hoped Loki knew the extent of Thor’s affection, but he could never tell because Thor had never been the best with words.

However, Loki did not return his gaze. “Even when you are king?”

“Of course,” Thor answered quickly, “especially then.”

They tended to avoid the topic of Thor’s impending kingship. Thor did not wish to seem boastful of the title that Loki was very well capable of wielding himself.

“Very well. Although I can’t say I will be surprised if your memory fails you then as well, and you forget telling me all of this.” Loki chuckled, but Thor could not find any real amusement in the sound this time.

Loki sat up on the bed, blocking his face from Thor’s view. He watched as Loki’s hand came up and ran through his hair, an old habit that generally signified Loki’s uneasiness.

Thor sighed and sat up, facing Loki. “I would have you listen, Loki...I know that we have not been as close these last years, and it is perhaps equally my fault – we have simply not pursued the same interests as of late, and I would have us spend more time together, it saddens me that I have such little knowledge in things that you hold in high value...”

Thor trailed off when he noticed Loki smiling at him now, though it was leaning heavily towards smirking. “Speak, oaf.”

Thor smiled and hoped he did not appear nervous. He did not know why he would feel nervous in Loki’s ever-calming presence. He reached up to place his hand on the back of Loki’s neck and did not meet resistance (Thor had seen few other people touch Loki casually aside from himself and their mother). Loki’s skin felt smooth beneath his rough hand, and warm – warmer for the wavy hair falling just past Loki’s shoulders.

“I would have you know, Loki, that I hold you in high value. You are my brother and I do not think of you lightly. I cannot imagine not having you at my side in this life.”

Loki surely thought it amusing when Thor’s hand tightened when he said certain words, but he did not mention it. He looked thoughtful as he lifted his own hand to absentmindedly tap his fingers along Thor’s wrist. Thor studied the contrast of skin tones, of alabaster against bronze. He wondered, briefly, about the image of their naked bodies against one another, only to be chased away by a new feeling of unease.

“Thank you, brother,” Loki said finally.

Thor smiled at him, watching Loki’s lashes as he blinked. His hand suddenly felt too warm on Loki’s neck, but he did not pull it away just yet in case it looked suspicious. He could feel Loki’s pulse against his palm; it was going at a normal rate.

“Are you alright, Thor?”

Thor nodded and pulled his hand away. This was ridiculous, this odd ball of nerves in his stomach. Thor had done nothing wrong.

Loki’s eyes narrowed. “You are a terrible liar.”

That was true. Now that the image had entered Thor’s mind, he seemed unable to rid himself of it. The image of them lying, pressed to one another, Thor becoming tangled in Loki’s long legs, his hand on the back of Loki’s neck for a reason other than reassurance –

It was suddenly hard to make himself hold eye contact with Loki, who was waiting expectantly for an explanation for Thor’s change in demeanor.

“I just,” Thor began (what would Loki think of him if he could see inside Thor’s mind now?), “feel distracted.”It was true enough. Loki always told Thor to keep some truth when telling lies, to make them both more believable and easier to remember later.

Then an idea came to mind. “I would have us do something fun, Loki, just the two of us. I would like to forget the palace for a short while.”

Loki cocked his head slightly, his lips splitting into the grin he sometimes wore when Thor was about to propose a new idea – though until now Thor would never have used the word beautiful to describe his own brother. The playfulness had sparked once more in Loki’s eyes.

“What do you have in mind?”

***

Thor and Loki had not played this game for at least two hundred years. However, game might not be the best word to describe what they had taken to calling Roulette. It involved highly complex magic that Thor could not possibly be bothered to hear Loki explain.

When Loki had first created Roulette, out of boredom, he and Thor had played it many times. What happened was that Loki and Thor would decide on a place and time to be transported to, for a set number of days. Once there, they would have no knowledge of their true lives in Asgard (something about blocking that part of their memory). Everything else would be random – everything from their social status to their very relationship (they were not always brothers).

Thor did not understand it, but somehow their personalities remained intact though they had a new set of false memories while playing Roulette. The point was simply to see how they would interact with different lives, and whenever they returned to Asgard they would remember their time and have many stories and much laughter.

The game never lasted more than a few weeks at the most, because Heimdall was instructed to pull them back home early if something important came up, such as Odin needing them or (though rarer) something dangerous happening to them. There were a few times that, because of the circumstances of their false lives, they had attempted to kill each other. The last time they played, Loki nearly succeeded in killing Thor. It was, perhaps, why they had not played in so long.

“How long do you wish to stay?” Heimdall asked.

It had been two days since Thor and Loki stayed up all night talking. Loki had to prepare his magic and Thor had cleared everything with their father, making sure that there was nothing of too much importance happening for the next few weeks.

“Two weeks,” Loki replied.

Thor felt excited, to share this experience with Loki. He always felt closer to Loki afterwards. The best part was that he was sure that once they returned, Thor would forget all about the shameful thoughts he had had about Loki lately.

“And where will you be staying?”

“Let us try North America, hm? But do surprise us with the exact location,” Loki prompted. He had been quite cheerful as of late. It pleased Thor to think that Loki missed their old closeness just as he did.

“Very well. I will bring you back if you are needed here, or if I deem it too dangerous to stay where you are,” Heimdall said.

Loki turned to Thor. “Ready, brother?”

Thor breathed in deeply, willing the flutter in his chest to go away, and grinned. “I am.”

Heimdall nodded once. “Enjoy your stay.”

Thor felt giddy, impatient, even as they were each swept up in blinding light.


	2. Roulette

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor meets Loki in Roulette

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to my beta, umakoo!
> 
> Feedback is always appreciated.

Thor had just finished tying his hair into a messy bun at the nape of his neck when his phone buzzed. He felt loose strands fall around his face as he picked up his phone off the bathroom sink counter. 

**Maya** : _We are all here, you on the way?_

Thor looked over himself in the mirror one last time before typing a quick reply to say that he was leaving and would be there soon. There was a club called Tryst, only a ten minute walk from his place. Thor’s friends had offered to pick him up, but he didn’t mind the exercise. It was a very pleasant night in May in Florida. Summer break had just begun for universities, so Thor was surrounded by many other beach-goers on the sidewalks. 

When he finally entered the place, Thor found his friends at the bar. Maya, Devin, and Isabel greeted him with cheers of “Happy birthday!” and Isabel pushed a shot into his hand. 

“Thanks, guys, what is this?” Thor asked. 

“Fireball,” answered Devin. 

"Make a wish!” joked Maya. The three held up identical shots. They all clinked the small glasses together and drank. Thor felt the sweet burn leave his throat to settle, warm, in his stomach. He might have shivered at the sensation, were it new to him. 

“What did you wish for, Thor?” Devin asked. 

Thor made them all laugh as he set the glass firmly on the counter top and answered, “Another!” 

A few hours and two more bars into the night, Thor was agreeably drunk. His friends were as well, so the odds of anyone driving Devin’s car home, the original plan, were low. The buzz, however, left Thor not minding at all. 

Thus far, Thor had danced with three girls and two guys. He was sure that any one of them would have come home with him gladly, even as Thor became more intoxicated. He would just rather enjoy time with his friends, since he hadn’t spent time with them since the summer before. 

That is, until Thor happened to glance in the direction of the bar. 

Leaning against the counter was a guy who Thor didn’t know if he could take his eyes away from. He was pale, a ghost compared to everyone else, as though to mock them all for their wasted time spent desperately tanning. His hair, as dark as the sky outside, fell prettily in waves and ended a few inches beneath his shoulders. His trim torso was hugged by a green v-neck, and his endless legs by dark jeans. 

Thor needed to get closer. 

As he did, he finally noticed that the man wasn’t alone. He was speaking to another man, the two of them leaning in close in order to hear above the music. The one Thor was interested in allowed his shoulder to be touched as they spoke. Thor didn’t like it at all. 

Luckily, the other man walked away after a minute. A small part of Thor’s mind chastised himself – the two could be dating, after all. But mostly, Thor felt nerves begin prickling his skin, and he approached the tall beauty. 

He was facing the bar when Thor was close enough to speak to him. Thor stood there, feeling dumbstruck as he struggled for something to say to get his attention. The bartender came by and placed a drink down for the guy, a mojito, and Thor saw his chance. 

By some miracle, Thor was able to fish some cash out of his wallet faster and place it down for the drink first. That caught his attention. 

The man slowly (or was everything going slow in Thor’s head right now?) placed his own wallet in his back pocket, picked up the drink and turned around. Thor’s heart beat a little faster now that he clearly could see his face. His eyes, greener than his own shirt, drifted downwards over Thor’s body. He eventually looked back up and locked his gaze on Thor’s face, a smirk in place. 

Thor still had no idea what to say, and suddenly wished he could rewind himself to three shots ago. But the man leaned in and said, close to Thor’s ear, 

“Would you like to buy me a drink?” 

His expression was more playful when he pulled back, and Thor laughed, feeling only minimally embarrassed. 

“I’m Thor,” He said. Thor noticed that he smelled good, a hint of the minty aroma from his mojito and something sweet and clean, like apples. 

“Loki,” he answered. 

Loki. Thor repeated it in his head a few times. He liked it. The name was different but it sounded oddly familiar. 

Again, Thor was left speechless, struck as he was by Loki. However, the alcohol had Thor leaning forward to speak anyway. 

“You’re beautiful,” he said. Loki’s hair brushed his nose, and Thor fought the urge to let his lips touch Loki’s ear when he talked. 

Thor felt stupidly proud of himself when he pulled back and saw Loki’s smile. The feeling grew as Loki leaned in again, 

“Thank you, are you here with anyone?” 

Thor shook his head, leaning in to add, “It’s my birthday.” 

Loki’s brows raised. “Have you made any wishes?” 

When Thor leaned in this time, his hand found Loki’s wrist and his fingers traced up Loki’s arm as he spoke. 

“Yes, but I didn’t know about you when I made them or they would have been different.” Thor couldn’t be sure if he imagined Loki’s quick intake of breath. 

When Thor leaned back, Loki turned around and caught the bartender’s attention again. Thor’s gaze traveled down Loki’s back and rested on his ass until Loki turned around. 

Thor wasn’t quick enough to look up and was met with another smirk. He felt heat rush to his cheeks at being caught so blatantly. 

“Do you mind?” 

Thor turned to look where the new voice came from. It was the man who had been conversing with Loki earlier. Just as he opened his mouth to say something along the lines of fuck off, Loki broke in. 

“I mind.” 

The man, surprised, looked at Loki, who only stared at him as though irritated with explaining something simple, almost challenging him to say more. The man glared at them both but walked away. 

Thor felt tension fade away that he hadn’t even realized was there. Loki stared past Thor a few more moments, maybe to make sure the guy didn’t come back, Thor didn’t know. But then Loki’s focus was back on Thor, where it should be, and he offered a shot to Thor that Thor hadn’t even realized was in his hand. 

Their fingers inevitably brushed when Thor reached out to accept the drink. Instead of letting go, Loki held onto the glass, making the contact last as he leaned into Thor’s personal space to speak again. 

“Make a wish, Thor.” 

Thor felt a shudder race through him as Loki’s lips barely touched his ear, the arousal going straight to his groin. He wasn’t laughing like he had when Maya made the same comment before. Thor hadn’t felt this attracted to someone in very long time, maybe ever. He silently prayed it wasn’t just the alcohol. 

When he drank, Thor wondered how Loki knew his favorite was Fireball. 

“Thor! I’ve been looking for you,” Devin suddenly appeared at their side. 

Thor felt some of the intoxication alleviate at the look of concern Devin wore. 

“Is everything ok?” 

“Maya and Isabel are both throwing up in the bathroom, we-” Devin stopped himself when he noticed Loki. He looked between the two a couple of times before continuing. “I’ll just get a taxi and make sure they both get home.” 

Thor tried to ignore Loki’s mouth twitching in what seemed like a struggle to keep from laughing. “Are you sure?” 

Devin smiled knowingly. “Positive. You’re the birthday boy; enjoy it. Are you good to get back ok?” 

Thor could walk but he didn’t want to get in trouble for public intoxication. Not that he was that far gone, but as tall as he was, Thor tended to stick out late at night. 

“I can drive him home,” Loki offered. 

Devin’s smile only widened. “Perfect. Thank you. Have a good night!” Just like that, he was gone. 

Loki fixed Thor with a look that had Thor short of breath. He leaned in again. 

“Want to get out of here?” 

Thor could only nod, praising whatever gods there might be as he followed Loki through the crowd and out the door. 

*** 

When he woke up, Thor found two pills, a glass of water, and a folded piece of paper on his night stand. He sat up, slightly confused, as he picked up the paper and opened it. 

_If your birthday wish last night didn’t come true – and we both know it didn’t – then text me. –Loki_

_PS: I couldn’t lock the door behind me, so you might want to do that when you finally wake up._

There was a phone number written as well. Thor felt his smile slowly become a grin as he reread the note a couple of times. He took the pills and drank the water, locked the front door, and returned to flop down on his bed again. 

The memories came back to Thor vaguely. He remembered getting to Loki’s car, but shortly after that he had suddenly felt so tired. It was so strange, like Thor had just finished a long, tedious journey. 

He picked his phone up and checked his messages, responding to the obligatory texts from his friends to let them know that yes, he made it home and no, he did not hook up with that guy. Then he started a new message. He typed in the number Loki had written and stared at the text box, wondering what to say. He finally typed, 

**Thor** : _Hey, it’s Thor_

and hit send. Thor felt his nerves rise as exactly four minutes passed. Maybe he had imagined Loki’s interest, maybe it was the alcohol – his phone buzzed. 

**Loki** : _Hey birthday boy. Feeling better?_

Thor sighed and typed again. 

**Thor** : _I would feel better with coffee. Want to meet me at the Starbucks on Thompson Lane?_

**Loki** : _What time?_

Thor felt nervous again, but now very excited. They agreed to meet in half an hour. Thor threw on clean clothes after showering, a light blue t-shirt and khaki shorts, and left his condo in a great mood despite his lingering headache. 

*** 

When Thor walked inside, Loki was at the counter placing his order. Thor suppressed a grin and pulled out his wallet as he walked to stand beside Loki. 

“I’ve got it, and can I add a tall black coffee,” Thor said and handed over the cash. 

Loki laughed when they walked away to wait for the order. 

“Is that a habit of yours?” 

Thor shrugged, almost forgetting to speak when he fully faced Loki again. It definitely wasn’t the alcohol making Loki attractive, thank god. 

“It is lately.” Thor could really appreciate Loki’s features more – both of his face and his body – now that he was sober. Today his hair was pulled into a low pony tail, which drew more attention to his lovely cheekbones. Thor wanted to trace them with his thumbs. He wanted to do a lot more than that, but Thor was trying to keep his thoughts tame so that he wouldn’t embarrass himself somehow. 

Their drinks were ready fairly quickly and they found a table in the corner. 

“So what exactly is that?” Thor asked, gesturing to Loki’s drink that was anything but black coffee. 

Loki didn’t answer right away. He took a long sip from the straw, and had a small smile as he swallowed. He licked his lips, and Thor took a sip of his coffee to keep from staring so much. The coffee was still too hot and Thor mentally cursed when it hurt his tongue. 

“It’s a s’mores frappe.” He held it out to Thor. “Want to try it?” 

Thor accepted the drink, disappointed that their fingers didn’t touch, and tried not to think too much about how Loki’s own lips had just been on the straw as he drank. It was all chocolate and sugary; Thor didn’t even know if there was actual coffee anywhere. 

“That is a milkshake,” was Thor’s verdict as he placed the cup on the table. 

Loki laughed and picked it up again. He seemed like he was in heaven with every sip. “So you don’t like it.” 

“It’s very sweet.” 

“That’s the point. I love sweets. You don’t like sweet things?” Loki attempted an innocent expression, and Thor bit his lip to keep from laughing. Loki smirked at that. 

“I am _very_ sweet. I drove a complete stranger home.” 

Thor had a few more things to say about the nature of Loki’s proclaimed sweetness, but it was true that he did Thor a favor last night. Thor nodded his agreement. “Thank you for that.” 

“You’re welcome. Were you really not worried at all?” 

Thor was in mid-drink. He frowned after swallowing. “About what?” 

Loki smiled like he was in disbelief. He leaned forward to rest his arm on the table. “Thor. I drove a stranger home, but _you_ let a stranger drive you home when you were drunk. Not that you don’t look like you can handle yourself,” Loki paused to drag his eyes over Thor’s torso for effect, making Thor feel too warm, “but you were so drunk you passed out on the way there.” 

Now Loki leaned back again with a little smirk that Thor was already starting to love. “Which is a shame, because you look like you can handle your liquor.” 

“I _can_ handle my liquor,” Thor said, quick to defend himself. 

Loki uncrossed his legs, spreading them just wide enough to where Thor couldn’t help but glance down; the smirk remained. “What else do you think you can handle?” 

Oh, fuck. 

Thor had never felt himself getting hard just from hearing someone say things that weren’t even explicit, but he now wished that he could adjust himself discreetly. Still, Thor didn’t want to look like he could be taken off guard by anything and everything Loki said (even though he enjoyed the feeling, honestly). 

So Thor leaned forward and let his eyes wander down Loki’s body just like Loki had done to him, deliberately slowly. He felt almost predatory when he locked eyes with Loki again. 

“You’ll have to let me show you.” 

There was only silence for the next few moments as the two men communicated without words. The lust was nearly tangible. Thor had never felt himself focus so much on one person before. 

They both visibly startled when Loki’s phone went off, then laughed. Loki checked his phone to see the caller, seemed to contemplate, then looked at Thor apologetically. 

Thor just shook his head, gesturing with his hand that it was fine. He turned his head politely away and only vaguely heard what Loki said while he looked around the store. 

It wasn’t long before Loki brought the phone away from his head. “I have to go – family needs me.” 

“Oh,” Thor said, trying not to showcase his disappointment. Yet as Thor watched Loki tap his phone a few more times, he couldn’t help adding, “Would you be free sometime this week?” 

Loki looked pleased. “Why don’t you ask me later,” he lifted his phone and wiggled it a few times emphatically, “and find out?” 

“I’ll do that,” Thor agreed. “And Loki,” he started, making Loki pause as he made to stand up and look at Thor expectantly. Thor felt slightly embarrassed and fumbled for his words, “Um, so last night – we didn’t do anything at all?” 

“No,” Loki shook his head and stood, adjusting his shirt for a moment. He fished a set of keys from his pocked and slid his phone in its place. The two stared at each other a few moments longer. Finally, Loki began walking. “See you, Thor,” he said as he passed Thor’s side, too far away before Thor could say anything back. 

Thor fought the urge to turn around to watch Loki leave for all of four seconds. He turned his head and could swear that Loki was purposefully making his ass sway like that. Thor stayed like that even after Loki was out of sight, only brought back to reality by the buzzing of his phone. He pulled it out. 

**Loki** : _You would remember if you had done anything with me. No matter how hammered._

The grin on Thor’s face felt massive. He was glad to be seated in the corner. 

*** 

After leaving Starbucks, Thor couldn’t stop thinking about Loki. About his eyes, his smirk, his pale skin, his ass, his legs. When he arrived home again, Thor was only mildly ashamed as he got off to thoughts of Loki in his bed, legs spread and hands tied above him, back arching off the sheets. 

Afterwards, Thor felt tired despite the coffee, so he took a nap (which also might have served to help Thor avoid texting Loki too soon). He didn’t wake up again until late afternoon. 

Thor glanced at the time on the oven after he put spaghetti noodles into a pan of boiling water. 7:25. Thor rubbed the scruff on his face; he looked at his phone on the counter. 

Surely enough time had passed to text Loki. Maybe Loki was even getting nervous that Thor had waited this long at all. The thought amused Thor more than anything because he couldn’t envision Loki appearing worried. 

Thor sighed. He was usually more like Loki with other people. 

Eventually, Thor really couldn’t stand it any longer and so at 7:57, once he had eaten, Thor sent a short message to Loki. He walked into the living room and lied on the couch. It made him feel silly at how happy he was when his phone buzzed again barely a minute later. 

They texted consistently for the next few hours. Thor turned on the TV but didn’t really pay attention to it. He just needed something going on so that creepily waiting for Loki’s responses wasn’t the only thing he was doing. 

Thor learned many things about Loki. The reason he had to leave earlier was because his aunt had been called into work on her off day, and asked Loki to watch her three kids. Loki was visiting her and others on his mom’s side of the family for a few weeks. His mom was supposed to be with Loki, but was unable to get the time off work at the last minute. 

Loki was a graduate student, like Thor. He was majoring in Spanish, hoping to become an interpreter so that he could travel the world. Thor imagined Spanish coming out in Loki’s smooth, rich voice and decided he would very much like to hear it. 

He also learned that Loki was very witty and that his humor was different from Thor’s, more dry, but Thor liked it. Nearly everything about Loki was different. The phrase opposites attract ran through Thor’s mind multiple times, and it had never seemed truer. 

It was close to midnight when Loki’s next text woke Thor up. He hadn’t sent anything in the last twenty-five minutes so Thor had been lulled to sleep by the faint sounds from the TV. 

**Loki** : _Sorry – meant to text back after showering but I crashed. It’s fucking exhausting keeping up with three kids!_

**Thor** : _It’s fine, I fell asleep too. Have a nice shower?_

Thor felt his cock stir at the idea of Loki naked in bed. His hair was probably still wet, clinging to his neck. Thor imagined gently gathering Loki’s hair in his hand before yanking it backwards, Loki’s lips parting in a quiet gasp- 

**Loki** : _Pretty nice_

**Loki** : _Is it worse that I got off to you in the shower, or that I’m telling you about it?_

Thor felt his face heat up as he reread the text two more times, then two more. His pants became increasingly uncomfortable as he typed. 

**Thor** : _It’s worse that you’re not here_

**Loki** : _Oh really, why? Have a problem now?_

Thor could just imagine his smug expression. He didn’t care right now. 

**Thor** : _Yes_

He almost didn’t bother checking the next text as he unbuttoned and unzipped his shorts. His right hand had just slipped beneath his briefs as he used his left to unlock his phone. 

**Loki** : _Don’t touch yourself_

Thor couldn’t believe what he just read. 

**Thor** : _Why??_

**Thor** : _I already did earlier today_

For some reason Thor felt like he looked more desperate for admitting that even though Loki had just done the same thing. He did as he was told, however, and only moved his hand to adjust himself in his clothing. 

**Loki** : _Already did what?_

Thor would have laughed if he wasn’t trying to will away his arousal. Loki knew exactly what he meant; Thor knew that, but he answered anyway. 

**Thor** : _I made myself cum thinking about having you spread out on my bed_

**Thor** : _Tied up_

He didn’t even know what made him add that last part. Thor turned over and tried not to feel too pathetic as he began grinding slowly into the couch. Anything to relieve some of this ache. 

**Loki** : _Thor, that is naughty...What are you doing?_

**Thor** : _Humping my couch_

**Loki** : _Hmm, that will probably just make it worse. I suggest you take a cold shower_

This was ridiculous. Loki wouldn’t even know if Thor was masturbating this very moment. Why the fuck was Thor listening to him? 

**Loki** : _Don’t disappoint me. Goodnight Thor!_

Thor heaved a heavy sigh. As much as it was killing him now, Thor was also enjoying following orders. It was just so unlike any of his previous partners. He could tell that Loki was both the best and worst news of his summer. A frustrated groan escaped Thor. 

**Thor** : _I won’t. Goodnight Loki_


	3. Beachin'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor and Loki get to know each other more, and in more ways than one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you umakoo for being my beta! :)
> 
> Thank you for leaving kudos/feedback, it is appreciated!
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter :)

Thor went for a long jog the next morning. He enjoyed seeing the sunrise when he could, a beautiful mixture of pinks, purples and blues. This morning, the more illuminated the world became, the more Thor’s eyes roamed. He found himself looking at trees, at potted plants.  


He was absorbed by everything green.  


When Thor got home, the first thing he did was take a shower. He tried to think of anything but Loki. But then, Loki didn’t say that Thor couldn’t touch himself after last night, right? At least that was Thor’s justification many minutes later while he watched large, white droplets seep into the drain.  


He _had_ to see Loki again. When he stepped out of the shower and glanced in the mirror, Thor thought about sending a picture of himself to Loki. Just the torso...? No. Not a good move. He could already imagine Loki’s amusement and he barely knew him.  


What was Loki even doing today? Thor had neglected to ask him the night before. He dried off and got dressed before sending a text.  


**Thor** : _Can I call you?_  


**Loki** : _I might be distracted but yes_  


Thor wondered what Loki meant by _distracted_ but called anyway. He sometimes found texting to be tedious. The phone rang three times before Loki answered.  


“Why, hello, Thor,” he purred.  


Honestly, Thor hated the cliché of having butterflies in someone’s stomach, but he couldn’t deny the sudden ball that had formed in his own at hearing Loki’s voice again.  


“Hi,” Thor answered, a new smile plastered across his face.  


“Give me one second,” Loki said. When he spoke again, his voice was more distant but still loud enough for Thor to hear. “Garrett, Ben, I’m going to be in your parent’s room for a few minutes. If I hear _any_ fighting, I’m calling your mom, understand? Call for me if you need something.”  


Thor had gotten up and begun pacing his room, unable to keep still with all the nervous energy. He wondered briefly if Loki was having the same issues.  


The click of a door was heard and a sigh from Loki let Thor know that they could speak again.  


“You really have a way with children,” Thor teased. He had moved into the kitchen now.  


“Is that why _you’re_ so taken with me?” Loki cheerfully quipped back.  


Thor laughed as he tapped his fingers along the granite counter top. “Maybe it is. Are they the same ones you watched yesterday?”  


“No, it’s a different aunt this time. My mom has three sisters and a brother who all live down here.”  


Thor stepped into the living room. “You don’t visit them much?”  


“What makes you say that?”  


Thor shrugged even though there was no one to see it. “I’ve never seen you before.”  


“Well, I haven’t seen them much since I was a kid. I prefer the weather back home.”  


Loki was from Denver. The weather was much colder there. It almost made Thor shiver to think about going anywhere that wasn’t all sun for most of the year.  


“I think you’re the first person to tell me that they don’t like the beach.”  


Loki laughed. “Does my complexion not already speak for itself?”  


Thor bit his lip for a few seconds. “I love your complexion.”  


He imagined Loki smiling like he did when Thor told him that he was beautiful at the bar and hoped that he wore the same smile now.  


“Thor, I can’t decide if I want to treat you like the big teddy bear that I think you are.”  


Thor walked out onto his private balcony. It was rather cloudy outside. He gripped the railing and watched someone walking their dog in the parking lot.  


“Any treatment would be better than last night.”  


“What do you mean?”  


Thor shook his head. “You know exactly what I mean.”  


“Was it frustrating?”  


“Unbelievably.”  


“Poor Thor,” Loki cooed, “Forgive me?”  


“That depends,” Thor answered, “Are you free tonight?”  


***  


It was just before the start of the sunset when Thor pulled into the free public parking lot beside the beach where he and Loki had agreed to meet. There weren’t many cars now that there was little sun to be had.  


He stepped out of his truck and enjoyed the warm breeze. His hair blew around his face a little bit, but Thor didn’t mind. Opening his phone, he began typing to let Loki know that he was parked –  


“Buenas noches,” Loki’s voice came from behind him.  


_Speak of the devil_ , thought Thor as he smiled and put his phone in his pocket. He turned around and couldn’t help that his mouth remained slightly open as he took in the sight of Loki.  


Thor might have called Loki’s smile shy, were it not so strange a thought.  


“Do you like the pants? I thought they were appropriately beachy,” Loki said. He wore straight-leg, cream-colored linen pants that accentuated his tall, lean figure and a thin maroon top that contrasted his skin in the loveliest way.  


“I do like them,” Thor agreed. He glanced at his own dark gray tank top and black swim trunks. “I feel underdressed now.”  


Loki shrugged. “Gray is a good color on you. It brings out your eyes,” Loki said and looked between Thor’s face and chest a few times, “like a storm.”  


“Uh, thank you,” Thor said, unsure of whether it was a good thing to be compared to such a thing. Loki’s eyes and shirt reminded Thor faintly of Christmas, but he refrained from saying so.  


“You’re very welcome.” Loki took a few steps closer to Thor, nearly but not quite being in his personal space. “So what’s the plan, Thor?”  


***  


Over an hour later, the sunset was nearly complete, the transformation of colors a brilliant display. Thor and Loki had walked for along the beach itself a little while before coming to the pier that Thor enjoyed observing from. They stood together, not quite touching, leaning against the rail and talking about both nothing and everything. Thor felt that any conversation, even if it involved the mundane, was important and worth having when Loki was involved.  


Thor had tried in the beginning not to openly stare at Loki. However, as they kept talking, Thor decided to fuck his reservations and look all he wanted to. Loki already knew of Thor’s interest and didn’t seem to mind the attention, so why not?  


“I haven’t actually been to the beach yet,” Loki stated, his hair blowing lightly across along his neck. Thor would _not_ be envious. “But this is beautiful.”  


He looked at Thor. “Thank you for making me come here.”  


Thor smiled. “You’re welcome. I didn’t think you would say no to coming at night since you wouldn’t be sun burnt.” He sometimes didn’t even know how he was talking when Loki was so, so beautiful.  


Loki returned the smile, and Thor’s chest felt like it was swelling with affection. He didn’t understand how Loki could go from being so sexual one minute to so sweet the next.  


_I told you I was sweet_ , Thor imagined Loki telling him.  


“How old are you, anyway? I don’t think I ever asked,” Loki said.  


“Twenty-five,” Thor answered.  


Loki moved so that their arms were pressed together. Thor welcomed it. He wanted so much for Loki to be wrapped in his arms but he held back. He was also trying to enjoy the unhurried pace between them, something Thor hadn’t experienced in a long time.  


“Did your wish ever come true?” Loki asked playfully. He nudged Thor’s hip with his own.  


Thor let out a huff of a laugh. “Not yet. I think it’s coming in installments.”  


Loki laughed outright. Thor noticed his straight, white teeth and wondered what the catch was with Loki that he hadn’t figured out yet (other than that Loki had to leave eventually, but Thor had put that far from his mind).  


“Loki,” Thor said, gaining his attention when he hadn’t really meant to.  


“Yes, Thor?” Loki asked, smiling as he bit his lip as though he knew it would drive Thor crazy.  


Thor had no idea what to say. There was so much he could say. _I really like you. You’re stunning. I’ve never been so into someone in such a short amount of time. Please come to my place tonight. Don’t ever leave._  


“I really want to kiss you,” Thor admitted, softly.  


Loki said nothing but turned so that he faced Thor more, never breaking their eye contact. Thor mirrored the movement and they stood closer than ever before. As they brought their faces closer, Thor’s heart beat impossibly fast, pounding loudly and drowning out everything but Loki. He didn’t even notice that he brought his hand up to place it on Loki’s neck, a tingling sensation racing through Thor’s spine at even this small amount of contact.  


In the back of Thor’s mind, he marveled that he had known Loki only three days. It felt like much, much longer.  


They were so close. Thor hardly registered Loki’s hand reaching up to grasp his own. His eyes shut, waiting for the feeling of soft lips.  


The feeling didn’t come. Instead, Loki turned his head so that Thor’s kiss landed on his cheek. Still soft, but not what Thor wanted. His eyes opened, his brain barely keeping up as Loki leaned in and spoke into his ear,  


“Installments, Thor.”  


Thor’s mouth dropped when Loki pulled away, his bright laughter filling the air again.  


“Loki,” Thor said before sighing loudly, “You are _killing_ me!”  


Loki didn’t stop laughing one bit. Thor couldn’t find it in himself to really be upset.  


“I’m sorry, I couldn’t resist,” Loki said. A few giggles still made their way from Loki’s lips. Thor found it endearing.  


Loki took a step back. His skin was practically glowing in the near-darkness.  


“Still think you can handle it?” he asked and held out his hand.  


Thor didn’t hesitate for a second. He reached out and their hands linked as they began walking toward the exit of the pier. Thor didn’t bother trying to banish his smile as they talked and strolled back toward the parking lot, one of their hands squeezing the other’s periodically.  


When they reached the parking lot, he tried to ignore the building disappointment at having to part ways soon. They held hands all the way to Thor’s truck. His next question made him feel a little bit vulnerable, but Thor was currently beyond caring.  


“Can I see you soon?”  


Thor heard the pleasant sound of Loki’s soft laughter. Then Loki let go of his hand. Thor didn’t have enough time to really mourn the loss of contact because Loki’s mouth was suddenly on his, his hands fisting in Thor’s shirt.  


Thor felt incredibly heady as he returned the kiss, with both affectionate and wanton feelings swarming inside his being. He lowered his hands to grip Loki’s hips. Loki’s hold on his shirt tightened, and Thor guided him backwards a few steps until he was crowding Loki against his truck.  


The kiss steadily deepened as their impatience from the last three days began to show itself. Thor felt a new rush of arousal every time their tongues met. Loki reached up and wrapped his arms around Thor’s shoulders, entangling his hands in Thor’s hair. It allowed Thor to press himself more fully against Loki, and he loved that Loki pressed back.  


When Thor pulled away, it was only to begin a new assault of kisses, starting with Loki’s jaw line and continuing toward his neck. Loki allowed it, even turning his head in an admission of his enjoyment. Thor’s lips ghosted along the shell of Loki’s ear and then nipped at his ear lobe. Loki gave pleased little gasps and faint sounds of appreciation, and Thor wanted to hear more. As he kissed down Loki’s lovely neck, he decided to bite just above where it met his shoulder. It wasn’t enough to leave a mark, but it was still enough to be painful.  


“ _Thor_ ,” Loki sighed, his grip in Thor’s hair tightening. A low moan escaped Thor just at hearing Loki say his name like that.  


It was wonderful to have Loki coming undone in front of him. Loki, who until this point was always so poised, seemingly a step ahead of Thor all the time (not that Thor would have been able to explain this thought were he asked about it).  


Thor’s hands wandered beneath Loki’s shirt, barely grazing the soft skin he found there.  


“So beautiful,” Thor murmured. He lifted his head to press their foreheads together. When Loki opened his eyes, Thor could tell that the green of his irises had diminished to a thin rim. Loki brought one of his hands to stroke along Thor’s cheek.  


They stayed like that for a few seconds, but neither seemed able to keep from closing the space in order to drown in each other’s kiss once more. Thor reveled in every second of it. When they finally pulled away again after what felt like hours rather than minutes, Thor was painfully aware of the bulge in both his shorts and Loki’s pants.  


“I want you so bad,” he said, just above a whisper.  


“I know,” Loki said and gave Thor one more peck, “but not tonight.”  


Thor could almost laugh because he should’ve seen that coming. So he leaned down to nip and lick along Loki’s neck, willing to take whatever Loki would give him. Loki hummed approvingly.  


“You want me just as much,” Thor said and rolled his hips forward to prove his point.  


“Yes,” Loki admitted, the word breathy as Thor bit him again.  


_Finally_ , Thor thought.  


“But,” Loki said and finally pushed Thor away, though they didn’t stop holding each other, “I like making you wait.”  


Thor didn’t think that anyone had made him feel quite so flustered before. Or so content. Or so eager for more.  


***  


The next day, Thor would have loved to spend all of his time with Loki. Unfortunately, Loki had promised a different aunt – the only one without children – that he would spend the day shopping with her for her and her husband’s anniversary. And Thor had promised to have lunch with his friends.  


That didn’t stop them from texting back and forth continuously. Thor had earned more than one teasing remark about how he kept smiling at his phone, and they hadn’t even placed their orders yet.  


**Loki** : _I’ve managed to drag her into a lingerie store. I can tell from the way she talks that their sex life is lacking._  


Thor sent a quick reply and tried to remain as engaged as he could in the conversation. Several minutes went by without a response. Thor became more and more invested in what his friends were saying. It was without urgency that Thor opened his phone the next time it buzzed.  


**Loki** : _What do you think?_  


Below the text was a picture that made Thor completely forget where he was. Loki was standing in a fitting room, phone in hand in order to take the picture. What had Thor gawking was the deep red, lacy corset that clung deliciously to Loki’s torso and the matching thong just below it.  


Thor fleetingly remembered that he was in public and looked up to nod at whatever Maya had just said. His friends exchanged looks but thankfully said nothing.  


**Thor** : _Fuck, Loki_  


**Thor** : _You are so fucking sexy_  


There were garters hanging from the bottom of the corset, overlapping the thong and resting on the tops of Loki’s thighs. They weren’t attached to anything, but it was still hot. Thor wanted to spread Loki’s thighs, hook his wonderful legs over Thor’s arms and take Loki against the wall.  


**Loki** : _What about now?_  


Another picture came through. In this one, Loki was facing away from the mirror. He stood with his legs spread, bent forward with one hand against the door to hold himself up. His ass was perfect. Against Loki’s snowy skin, the outfit made him look like the best Christmas gift Thor could ever think to open.  


**Thor** : _You have to stop doing this to me_  


**Loki** : _Doing what?_  


**Thor** : _Making me hard when you know I can’t do anything about it_  


**Loki** : _Go to the bathroom_  


Thor stared at his phone, dumbfounded.  


**Loki** : _Take care of it. And send me a pic_  


Thor looked up and searched for the restroom; luckily, it was nearby so he wouldn’t have to walk across the restaurant in this condition. He excused himself from his friends and wondered briefly why he listened to everything Loki said without question.  


In the stall, Thor was taking out his phone to snap a picture when he had a different idea. He decided to take a short video. Switching his phone to video mode, Thor took himself in his hand. He had never felt the need to be shy about revealing his body to anyone for the first time, and this was no exception. He was well-endowed and Thor had enjoyed using that advantage for the pleasure of several partners before.  


His breathing was almost shaky with the effort of being silent; he was highly turned on by the situation and it didn’t take long to bring himself to full hardness. Then he hit the record button. It began with the phone held close so that only the tip was shown. First, he gently tugged the foreskin down to reveal the smooth head, where precum had already gathered along the slit. Thor rubbed his thumb in a circular motion to smear it, a shudder running through him in the process. Then he gradually dragged his hand down the shaft, pulling down his foreskin as he went, and followed the motion with his phone. Thor sent that first.  


He recorded another quick video – this time with the phone held farther back so that his full length was in the shot, along with the short, blond curls that encircled it. Thor imagined that it was Loki touching him as he stroked himself. He continued to spread precum down his long, full cock, which was throbbing at this point from the slower pace that Thor had set for himself.  


However, he was also very aware of time. So once Thor sent the second video, he brought himself off quickly. He checked his phone again before going back out to his friends, feeling his face heat up at the latest message.  


**Loki** : _Mmm...I knew you would be fun :)_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear it's a coincidence that the Earth chapters keep ending with a text, lol!


	4. Wrapped Around Your Finger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you always to Nora as my beta :) 
> 
> This is the chapter that fully warrants the rating!
> 
> Feedback is lovely. Like the readers of this fic. Hope you continue to enjoy it!

To Thor’s displeasure, they didn’t see each other that day, but they did set up plans for the next night. Loki agreed to come to Thor’s condo where Thor would cook dinner, on the grounds that Loki would make dessert. 

_“You know what dessert is, right?” Loki asked on the phone, teasing Thor about his fit body._

_“That’s what you are, right?” Thor answered._

_“I knew there was something wrong with you. Cannibalism, Thor, really.”_

_“I mean, I would definitely love to eat you tomorrow.”_

Thor was fidgety all day. He couldn’t sit still for more than five minutes, and even then his foot would shake. And he couldn’t stop randomly smiling, either. 

After returning from a workout at his gym that morning, followed by a trip to buy groceries, Thor showered and cleaned the place even though it wasn’t very messy to begin with. He didn’t know what to do with himself after that so he went for a jog, took another shower, and cleaned the condo again. Then it took him forever to decide what to wear. Eventually, Thor stuck with a crimson red V-neck and black jeans. 

As the afternoon dragged on, it was finally time to start cooking, making Thor grateful to have a real task to get done. He threw his hair into a small pun and set to making lasagna. Just as he really started, Thor realized that he had no idea if Loki could be a vegetarian. So he made one half with beef and the other without. 

The doorbell rang when the lasagna had only minutes left in the oven. Thor had just finished setting the table. He thought his heart would lunge right out of his chest the closer he got to the door. As he opened the door, Thor wore a broad smile which earned an answering one from Loki. 

“Hello, Thor,” Loki said. He carried a plastic bag in each hand, glancing around the place as Thor held the door open for him to step inside. 

“Hi,” Thor answered and shut the door. He turned around and took in the vision standing before him. Loki wore his hair down, but today he had straightened it so it was a few inches longer than usual. It looked soft and glossy and fell around Loki’s face in a gorgeous way, parted on one side as it was. He wore an emerald green button-down with the sleeves rolled up and jeans that hungrily clung to his legs. 

When he focused again, Loki was smirking. 

“Where can I set these down?” he asked and lifted the bags slightly. 

Thor walked the few steps to Loki and reached out. 

“Here, I’ll take them for you,” he said. Loki, for once, seemed surprised as he accepted the offer and relinquished the items. 

“Teddy bear,” Thor heard Loki say behind him, followed by a small giggle. It only made Thor grin. 

Loki followed him into the kitchen. “It smells good in here,” he commented. 

“Thank you,” Thor said and set the bags on the counter. 

When he turned around, Loki stepped right up to him and draped his arms around Thor’s neck. 

“Miss me?” he asked Thor. 

“Probably more than I should have,” Thor said. It was probably unsafe to reveal just how much he had missed Loki (even though Thor had a feeling that Loki would love to hear it). The grin he received might have made Thor melt on the spot if Loki didn’t lean in and lock their lips together. Thor eagerly pulled him close, his heart too full at the knowledge that Loki had possibly missed him just as much as he did Loki. 

When he pulled back, Loki smiled. He leaned forward, beside Thor’s face, and Thor could hear him breathe in through his nose.

“You smell nice,” Loki said and nuzzled Thor’s neck. It gave Thor goosebumps. 

“You look amazing,” Thor returned. 

“Mmm,” Loki hummed and traced his lips up to Thor’s ear, “I bet you taste amazing.” 

Chills trickled through Thor’s spine. He closed his eyes and parted his lips as he felt Loki’s warm, soft tongue glide along his ear. 

Then the over timer went off. 

They reluctantly parted. Thor retrieved the hot pan and placed it on the stove. 

“I hope you’re hungry,” Thor said as he fetched a knife from a drawer. He noticed that Loki had taken out the bottle of wine he’d brought from one of the bags. 

“Oh, absolutely ravenous,” Loki laughed as he accepted the cork screw from Thor. 

***

As it turned out, Loki was not a vegetarian, but he found it very thoughtful of Thor to have prepared for it. As they ate and talked, Thor imagined themselves years down the road, sharing more meals like this one and still finding pleasure in their conversations. For the first time, Thor was slightly concerned with how invested he felt already. But then he would think of Loki’s kiss and the way he held onto Thor – it couldn’t be too bad if their feelings were mutual, right?

He loved the way Loki held his wine glass and the movement of his throat as he swallowed. He loved the way Loki would wave his fork around when he said something he was enthusiastic about, and how he would cock his head as he listened to Thor speak, seemingly unaware of it. He loved when Loki would use his free hand to flip his hair from one side to the other at random intervals, making it messy in the best way. 

When they finished eating, they gathered their plates and silverware and deposited them in the sink. Thor rinsed them off while Loki retrieved his ingredients to make cupcakes. 

“Do you have a phone speaker?” Loki asked. 

Thor did have one. He grabbed it from his room and brought it to Loki, who synced his phone with the blue tooth and soon music filled the room. They continued drinking wine and conversing while making the cupcakes. They were distracted more than once by being drawn to one another’s lips, almost helplessly, pulling away just as they became nearly too caught up in one another. 

When Loki pulled the golden cupcakes from the oven and set them down, Thor was pleasantly buzzed, but not drunk. He was glad of that because he wanted to remember tonight. 

Loki opened the container of chocolate icing. Holding a butter knife out to Thor, he asked, 

“Do you want to help ice them?

Thor nodded, though he had no such intentions. He took the knife, gathered a small glob onto the tip, and smeared it along Loki’s mouth. Loki smirked. 

“That was very helpful.” 

“Sorry,” Thor said, not sounding sorry at all. “Let me get that for you.”

He leaned in and slid his tongue across Loki’s soft, awaiting lips. The sweetness of the icing tasted strange after having just taken a sip of wine. After a moment, when he had licked Loki clean, Loki opened his mouth and Thor was more than happy to taste Loki’s tongue again. 

Leaning back, Loki said nothing as he gathered more icing onto his finger tip and held it expectantly in front of Thor’s mouth. Thor’s lips parted obediently, allowing it, and he kept his eyes on Loki as he licked and sucked his finger. Loki didn’t seem to be aware of his own lips parting as he intently watched Thor’s mouth work long after the icing was gone. 

“You’re distracting me,” Loki accused when he pulled his hand back, as though putting his finger in Thor’s mouth had been Thor’s idea. But he wore a sly smile. 

“Am I?” Thor asked, feigning innocence. 

Loki looked him over once. “Change the music. I hate this song.” He turned around and turned his attention back to the cupcakes. It was a turn-on for Thor that Loki simply expected and seemed to know that Thor would do as he asked. 

So Thor changed the song as instructed, choosing ‘Motivation’ by Kelly Rowland. 

He walked back to where Loki was icing the cupcakes. He came up just behind him, their bodies aligned but not touching. He rested his hands against the counter on either side of Loki and looked over his shoulder.

“Mind if I watch?” he asked. 

“I guess not,” Loki shrugged, but Thor could see that he was biting his lip to keep from smiling. 

He watched Loki fully ice two cupcakes. The tension between them only rose as neither of them said anything and Thor forced himself not to touch Loki just yet. As Loki began on a third, Thor lifted his hand and gathered Loki’s hair back, making sure to gently brush his fingers along Loki’s neck. Loki’s smirk was his only reaction. That didn’t bother Thor. 

On the fourth, Thor licked Loki’s exposed neck from just above his shirt collar to just behind his ear. 

“Is this distracting you?” he asked, voice low. 

“No,” Loki answered. His tone didn’t sound so certain, to Thor’s amusement. 

“Good,” he said before slowly working his way back down the pale skin with warm, open-mouthed kisses. With one hand he held Loki’s hair off of the back of his neck and Thor moved there next. He traced his lips slowly up and down, barely touching the skin, inhaling Loki’s wonderful scent. Then he placed light kisses just beneath Loki’s hair, and he could’ve sworn that Loki had the faintest shiver. 

“Thor,” Loki said, and Thor could tell that he was working to keep his voice steady, “would you hand me my wine?”

Thor smiled to himself. “Of course.” He picked up both of their half-full wine glasses from the other side of the kitchen, handing one to Loki, who now leaned against the counter to face him. Thor stepped back and leaned against the opposite counter. 

They both took sips and watched each other. After a moment, Loki smiled, his eyes sharp. ‘FutureSex/LoveSound’ by Justin Timberlake began playing. 

“You think you have me wrapped around your finger, don’t you?” 

“No,” Thor shook his head, unable to mask a small smirk of his own, “but I’d like to soon. Maybe tonight.”

Loki’s mouth dropped, but he looked utterly delighted. He spun the glass stem in his hand for a couple of seconds. He changed subjects when he spoke again,  
“I really liked those videos you sent me.” 

“You told me that,” Thor said. 

Loki took a longer drink and stepped forward. His smile might have been sweet were it not for the way he gazed intently at Thor.  
“I guess I did,” Loki agreed. He approached Thor, turning around just as he was close enough to touch. He backed up and their bodies touched lightly, not pressed together like Thor wanted. 

“But did I tell you,” Loki began as he took hold of Thor’s free hand and brought it to his hip, “that I came all over myself in the fitting room yesterday, watching them?” Pressing his ass into Thor’s crotch, Loki began moving his hips to the music. 

Thor knew that Loki could feel his erection through his jeans, renewed at the mental image he’d just been given and the friction Loki provided. He downed his glass and set it aside. 

“How did you clean it up?” he asked after a beat, distracted as he was by watching Loki’s movements. He thought he knew the answer already, though. 

“I’ll show you.” Loki set his glass down too and took Thor’s other hand into his. Thor expected what was coming but still gasped when he felt two of his fingers slide past Loki’s lips. Not being able to see Loki almost made it better because Thor’s complete attention was focused on the warmth of Loki’s mouth, the wet glide of his tongue and the delicate suction every now and then. 

Thor rested his forehead against Loki’s shoulder, eyes closed as he prayed for the strength not to simply sling Loki over his shoulder and drop him on his bed. Loki never stopped gyrating against Thor, who was trying not to grip Loki too tightly but was probably failing. Not that Loki complained. 

Unable to take the sensation any more, Thor removed his fingers with an obscene, slick sound. He grasped Loki’s chin and tilted his head to the side so that Thor could kiss him. It was a little sloppy because of the angle but they were both so eager and Thor couldn’t imagine anything better in that moment. He moved his other hand to slide up and beneath the fabric of Loki’s shirt. 

The shirt gradually rode up as Thor branded every inch of Loki’s skin with his touch. He reached higher, waiting for Loki to tell him to stop and praising every second that he didn’t. He explored further and found a nipple, already hard. Thor played with it anyway, enjoying the muted sounds coming from Loki and the way he arched into the touch. Loki’s hips no longer moved with the song but still managed to wiggle against Thor and drive him crazy. 

Then Thor lowered his hand again, back down Loki’s torso. He lightly dragged his nails across the sensitive skin, vaguely aware of Loki’s hand in his hair, pulling it loose from its bun. Finally, Thor found the waistband of Loki’s jeans. He slipped his fingers just below the material and ran them teasingly across Loki’s skin. Loki stilled his movements; he pulled back momentarily, looking at Thor as they both caught their breath. Thor held his gaze but was secretly fearing Loki’s refusal to go any further. There was a familiarity in the calculation of Loki’s expression that Thor couldn’t quite place.

However, Loki closed his eyes and kissed him again, this time languidly. Relieved, Thor continued his teasing. He found that though his need grew achingly, Thor enjoyed dragging this out. The farther they went, the less they could experience for the first time. 

_I like making you wait_ , Loki had said. Thor had to admit that there was something of a thrill to it. 

Thor kept his hand in the same area, just above or below Loki’s waistband. He would trace his fingers lightly, drawing patterns across skin, going a little further toward Loki’s center before pulling back. Loki would roll his hips backward every so often. He kissed Thor more deeply, his soft moans fading to soft whines every other time that Thor’s hand moved away from his obvious need. Thor didn’t know how much longer he could stand hearing that. 

Eventually, Thor felt his hand come into contact with soft hair and didn’t know how he stopped himself from going further when they both moaned. He broke their kiss. 

“Let me see you,” he said against Loki’s lips, not sure if it was a command or a plea. His fingers pressed a little further downward and it drew a gasp from Loki. 

“Please,” Thor added. 

He almost couldn’t believe it when Loki nodded. He untangled himself from Thor and walked to his phone on the counter. 

“Sit on the couch,” he said, not looking up as he tapped his screen. 

Thor didn’t need to be told twice. He went to the living room, turning off the main lights as he went. He turned on two lamps before he sat on the middle cushion, wondering what Loki was planning. He wished he could get rid of his annoyingly tight jeans. 

Loki followed after only seconds. He kept his distance from Thor though he stood in plain view. He tapped his phone again before tossing it to the nearby love seat. Thor felt his foot tap impatiently as Loki gave him a playful little smile. He heard the opening notes of ‘Often’ by The Weeknd begin. 

First, Loki slipped off his sandals and gently kicked them out of the way. Then he turned around and began dancing to the song. Thor thought he had already gotten more than his share of watching Loki’s ass sway, but apparently not yet. He was transfixed by Loki’s graceful form and long legs, so much so that he didn’t notice what Loki’s hands had been doing until he was tossing his unbuttoned shirt to the side. 

Thor watched as Loki slowly worked his way down to the floor before coming back up and turning around. Though he didn’t have Thor’s bulk, Loki did have definition to his arms and stomach. Thor wanted to touch every bit of him. 

It was when Loki began undoing his jeans that Thor’s breath hitched. 

“Take off your shirt,” Loki said. Thor did so as quickly as he could so that he wouldn’t miss more than he had to of Loki’s strip tease. He couldn’t help but feel pleased as Loki’s eyes looked over his form approvingly. 

When Loki pulled his jeans down, a smirk in place, Thor thought he would come right then. Loki kicked the jeans away too and kept dancing as he finally began making his way to the couch. He was wearing a pair of black, nearly sheer panties with purple accents. The fabric was barely enough to contain his erection. When he was close to Thor, Loki turned around and bent over for a moment, giving Thor a direct view of his ass cheeks that were only half-covered by the material. It took everything in Thor to keep his hands back. 

“You like them?” Loki asked. 

“Yes. God, Loki,” was all Thor could think to say. He was too beyond words for the moment. 

Then Loki stood back up and turned around. He let Thor’s eyes roam a few moments longer before straddling his lap. Thor was almost afraid to touch Loki, worried that he would suddenly wake up to find that none of this had been real. 

“What are you thinking?” Loki asked as he slid his hands along Thor’s shoulders and down his arms. They were both still drinking in the sight of one another. Alabaster against bronze. For a moment, Thor thought he felt something like deja vu while looking at the contrast in skin tones. 

He put his hands on Loki’s knees, moving them slowly up his thighs. “I can’t believe how lucky I am.”

“Luck has nothing to do with it,” Loki said. He tilted Thor’s chin up and held his face in his hands as they kissed, pressing against Thor, their skin warm when it finally made contact. Thor kept a hand on Loki’s thigh and the other in his hair, threading through tresses that were just as soft as they looked. Loki nibbled at his bottom lip, tugging it gently between his teeth. When he stopped, Thor grabbed a fistful of Loki’s hair and pulled it back, forcing a gasp from Loki as he neck was exposed to Thor’s greedy lips. 

Thor left a wet trail of kisses down Loki’s throat, scraping his teeth across a collar bone. When Loki began lifting his head back up, Thor yanked his hair again, receiving a surprised moan. He continued downward to Loki’s left nipple, licking and nipping like he was paid to do it, feeling Loki squirm in his lap. 

He felt Loki attempt to lift his head again as he switched to the right nipple. Thor released his hair this time in favor of raking his nails down Loki’s back, hard enough, he was sure, to leave red marks. 

“Thor, _yes_ ,” Loki said, nearly a whimper. His hands moved down Thor’s chest, pausing only briefly to pinch at Thor’s nipples. 

Thor groaned and lifted his head. Loki met him half way for another kiss, this one full of teeth and hunger. Loki reached for his jeans and Thor could barely think as they were unbuttoned and unzipped. Before Loki could do anything else, Thor placed his hands on Loki’s ass and squeezed hard. 

“You ready?” he asked, grinning. 

“For what – ah!” Loki clung to Thor as he stood up, wrapping his legs around his waist. 

“We’re going to my bed,” Thor said and started walking. 

Loki, seemingly unfazed, leaned in and nibbled his ear lobe. “And then what?”

“And then,” Thor rounded a corner, careful not to hit Loki’s legs, “I’m going to make you scream.”

He felt Loki’s legs tighten around him. “You think I’m going to let you fuck me?” Thor could just hear the smile behind the question. 

They reached the bedroom. Thor made a detour of pressing Loki against a wall, harder than he meant to, but he doubted that Loki minded as they kissed. Thor didn’t think he’d ever liked kissing anyone half as much as he did Loki. 

“I think you’re going to beg me to,” He said, not giving Loki a chance to respond before kissing him again. He didn’t miss the way Loki moaned, though, or the way the grasp in his hair tightened. 

He finally brought Loki to the bed and placed him down carefully like the prize that he was, that Thor was somehow winning. He stood back up and took off his jeans, secretly basking in the way that Loki watched him. Like Thor was the prey.

“Come here,” Loki said. Thor obeyed like he always did. He crawled toward Loki, his breath catching at the sight of Loki spreading his legs in a silent invitation. Thor settled between them, taking in the sight of Loki as he did so. His disheveled hair, his dark, lustful gaze, his kiss-swollen lips – everything about him was more lovely than Thor ever thought he would be able to put into words. 

“Are these not coming off tonight?” Loki asked as he playfully tugged at the top of Thor’s boxer-briefs. 

Thor leaned down and kissed along Loki’s shoulder. “Only if you ask me to.”

After that, for all his talk, Thor found that he was quickly losing patience. He made his way down Loki’s torso hastily, only placing a few sporadic kisses as he went. Loki’s breathing became louder the closer Thor got to the panties he still wore. 

When he reached them, Thor nuzzled the bulge he found there and breathed in Loki’s scent. He loved that the material was wet with precum. A low moan was heard from Loki, who pressed upward, following Thor’s touch. Instead, Thor moved to his inner thighs, kissing along one and then the other. When he couldn’t stand it anymore, Thor took hold of the panties and peeled them down Loki’s legs. 

Loki’s cock immediately sprang up toward his stomach, and he sighed now that he was finally uninhibited. Thor wanted to follow suit, but not yet. Once the panties were tossed aside, Thor wrapped his hand around Loki’s shaft, watching as precum gathered on the tip. His cock was just as lovely to Thor as the rest of Loki.

Loki’s eyes were half-closed while he watched Thor. When Thor leaned down to lick the salty drops from his slit, Loki cried out and turned his head to the side. His moans became steady as Thor took the head into his mouth, then louder as Thor took more and more. 

Thor tried to pay attention to what Loki liked most, though he was sure that they would have plenty of time after tonight to figure one another out (the thought of it made him happy). He kept his hands on Loki’s hips to keep him from moving too much. Loki’s voice and Thor’s occasional slurping noises were the only sounds in the room. Thor could listen to Loki like that for hours – even if his own release was delayed.

When Thor thought that Loki was close to coming, he pulled off completely. 

“Thor!” Loki looked up, thrown off by the sudden lack of contact. Even in his annoyance, there was still a dazed look about him. 

Thor couldn’t help his smile as he moved back up Loki’s body. 

“I know, I’m sorry...I’ll make it up to you,” he promised and distracted Loki with a kiss. Thor lowered his hips and began grinding against Loki, desperate for any friction. 

“Off, now,” Loki managed to get out. He tugged Thor’s final bit of clothing and Thor momentarily paused what they were doing to help. It felt wonderful to no longer be constrained, and even better to have _nothing_ between his and Loki’s skin. Thor happily lowered himself to become tangled up in Loki again. It was nearly overwhelming to simply _feel_ their bodies connect, to have Loki’s legs wrapped around him to keep him close, their lips claiming every inch of uncovered skin, their dicks pressing together when Thor ground his hips down. 

At some point, Thor managed to open the drawer of his night stand and pull out a small bottle of lube. He opened it and coated his fingers, spilling some in the process but not caring. Then he pulled Loki’s arms above his head, holding them in place with his other hand. 

He watched for Loki’s reaction when he reached down and, with a lubed finger, rubbed Loki’s hole. He felt it clench at the sudden contact. 

“Is this ok?” Thor asked. Loki only nodded. He looked gorgeous. 

As gently as he could, Thor pressed one finger inside. His own cock twitched almost painfully as Thor imagined himself inside Loki, who already felt tight around just a single finger. Thor moved it shallowly in and out, feeling Loki gradually relax. It wasn’t too long before Thor added a second. 

Loki made for an exquisite sight below him. His head was turned slightly to rest against his arm. His normally pale cheeks were tinted with color, covered partially by stray strands of dark hair. His mouth remained open to allow for a continuous flow of breathy sighs that went straight to Thor’s cock. 

He thought of Loki beginning to come undone at the beach two nights ago. That was nothing compared to now. It made Thor feel emboldened; he wanted Loki to lose himself completely. 

Leaning close, Thor nuzzled Loki’s neck. “Can you take more?” he asked. 

“Yes,” Loki nodded. In his periphery vision, Thor saw Loki’s legs strain to spread more than they already were. 

So Thor added a third finger. Loki arched his back as Thor moved them. As he worked on stretching Loki enough to take him, Thor brushed over something that made Loki moan loudly. Thor did it again with the same result. 

“Does that feel good? When I finger you like that?” Thor asked. 

“Yes, Thor – just like that,” Loki panted. Thor could feel his hips move, trying to meet Thor’s strokes. 

“You’re taking it so well,” Thor said, peppering kisses on Loki’s jaw. “Are you just as good at taking cock, Loki?”

Loki moaned at Thor’s words. “Yes, fuck.” 

“Yes, what?” It pleased Thor to no end that, for once, it was his turn to tease. 

“Yes, yes,” Loki chanted, momentarily distracted by what Thor was doing. Then he opened his eyes and looked at Thor. “I’ll be so good at taking your cock.” 

That almost broke Thor’s resolve. “Is that what you want?” He kissed Loki deeply, moving his fingers faster and curling them to hit that spot repeatedly. He wasn’t even sure if Loki was listening anymore, if his muffled whines were anything to go by. 

_Just say it_ , Thor thought. He didn’t know why the thought was so urgent. 

He stilled his hand and pulled back just enough see Loki’s face. Loki looked up at him, and Thor looked back expectantly. 

“Thor, do you think I’d be here, like _this_ (he clenched purposefully around Thor’s fingers for emphasis) if it wasn’t what I wanted?” Loki appeared almost amused despite everything. 

Thor resumed his previous movements inside Loki, but slowly. “Then tell me,” he coaxed. He placed his lips to Loki’s ear, finding the spot again with his finger tips and rubbing it, “Just tell me, and I’ll make it so, so good.” 

Loki softly mewled at the prolonged sensation. “God, Thor, fuck me, I want you to fuck me.” 

Thor couldn’t say no to that. 

He let go of Loki’s wrists and carefully removed his fingers. Loki watched him reach out and grab the lube, but he took the bottle from Thor before he could do anything with it. 

“Let me,” he said and poured a few drops onto his fingers. 

Thor bit his lip as Loki’s hand spread the lube onto him, lingering longer than necessary while he leaned up to place quick pecks across Thor’s chest. He honestly didn’t know how long he could last once he was inside. 

Once Loki stopped, he wiggled out from beneath Thor. Thor was confused until Loki turned over and onto his knees, his round arse presented to Thor for his enjoyment. He admired the view while he got in place behind Loki. As Thor traced his hand down the red lines he’d made earlier on Loki’s back, he was overcome by a strong feeling of possessiveness. He wanted to make Loki forget any other time before this, before them. 

He also felt a sudden need to protect Loki – from what, Thor didn’t know, but with it came another feeling, almost like a deep wickedness at what he was about to do. But Thor dismissed it. 

He aligned himself and, with one hand holding Loki’s hip and the other his shaft, Thor began guiding himself inside. He could hear Loki’s breathing slow down as the head was pushed in first. He’d been thoroughly stretched, but it was still tight (so wonderfully tight) as Thor slowly pressed forward. 

“You ok?” 

“Yes, don’t stop.” 

So Thor didn’t. He pressed in until he suddenly couldn’t anymore. Thor had to take a moment to not become overwhelmed by the tight heat enveloping him. It felt even better than he imagined. He could tell that Loki was trying to stay relaxed, his muscles clenching every few seconds. His slender fingers held firmly onto a pillow. 

A moment or two later, Loki pressed back, encouraging Thor to move. He pulled out a bit and then slid back in; Thor repeated this numerous times, letting Loki get used to his size for as long as he needed, even though his body was screaming for Thor to just slam inside. 

“You feel amazing,” Thor said. 

“You too...You can go faster.”

Though it was said as a suggestion, Thor knew it wasn’t one. He picked up speed and it felt great, but Thor was still suppressing his need to just let go. It wasn’t long before Loki was panting again. 

“Yeah, baby, come on,” Loki breathed, reaching out to grip one of the rails of the headboard. “Fuck me like you want to.”

“Fuck, Loki,” Thor gasped, probably bruising Loki’s sides from his grip. He finally stopped holding back. Loki cried out when Thor thrust _hard_ inside him and didn’t stop. He fucked Loki with a desire that ran deeper than any he’d ever known, urged on by the buildup of their previous encounters and something else.

Loki’s shameless vocalization of his own enjoyment reinforced their mutual craving for one another. Thor didn’t think his own name had ever sounded so perfect as it fell from a pair of lips, said as though it brought with it one’s very salvation. The knuckles of Loki’s hand were white as he steadily held the rail. 

“There, right there,” Loki said suddenly, his voice keen. 

Thor tried to drive into Loki the same way; it was a few more tries before he found it again but once he did, Thor made sure he didn’t miss it. He felt immense pride as Loki became even louder than before, sounding absolutely wrecked. All because of Thor.

After a little while, Thor knew he couldn’t last much longer. 

“Loki, I’m close,” he warned, sounding a little breathless himself. 

He watched as Loki’s free hand moved down, between his legs to stroke himself. 

“You look so fucking good like that,” Thor heard himself say, his lust forming his words. “Gonna make yourself cum for me?” 

“Yes, Thor, _fuck_ ,” Loki answered. 

Thor continued his verbal encouragement, and Loki was screaming as he came not even a minute later. The sound of his voice, coupled with the way he involuntarily tightened around Thor, had Thor following soon after. His vision was very blurry as he spilled inside Loki, chanting his name a few times as he rode out his orgasm. 

When it was over, Thor felt dazed when he pulled gently out of Loki. He saw his seed begin to spill down Loki’s inner thighs and was worried for a moment. They hadn’t even discussed if it was ok for Thor to actually come inside Loki, or even if they should use protection at all. But then, Thor had a feeling that if Loki didn’t want something to happen, then it wouldn’t happen. That eased his conscience. 

He was about to let himself collapse on the bed, intending on pulling Loki close, but Loki was suddenly crawling away and walking. 

Thor sat down and watched him go, still catching his breath. He was perfect. “Where are you going?” he asked. 

Loki stopped in the doorway to the bathroom and turned around. His expression was smug. “You didn’t think I was actually staying the night, did you?” he said before heading inside the room. 

Thor’s heart dropped. 

“I’m kidding!” Loki called, followed by his laughter. 

Thor didn’t think he’d ever felt such relief before. He let out a shaky laugh and went to the bathroom. He started brushing his teeth while Loki cleaned himself up. Once he was done, Thor offered the tooth brush to Loki, who gave him a look but accepted it. 

“Most people find this gross,” he commented as he squeezed out tooth paste.

Thor smiled at him. “I guess we aren’t most people.”

While Loki brushed his teeth, Thor took the comforter off the bed and left it wadded up in the floor; he couldn’t be bothered to take it to the laundry room right now. He found a spare comforter in his closet and spread it over the bed before crawling into it. 

Thor felt a giddiness pierce through his exhaustion when Loki joined him beneath the covers. Loki was spending the night. Loki would still be here in the morning. 

The room was dim, the only light coming from a lamp on the night stand. Loki smiled somewhat shyly as he scoot closer. They lied on their sides, facing each other, close but not close enough for Thor. 

“Hi,” Thor said, grinning. 

Loki giggled. “Hi, yourself.” 

Thor reached out and cupped Loki’s face before he kissed him. He arranged himself closer and Loki followed his lead. Their bodies became entangled as they shared a slow, sweet kiss. 

When they pulled away, Loki moved to where his head rested below Thor’s. Thor felt his breath on the hollow of his throat. He stroked Loki’s hair and neither of them spoke for a few minutes. Thor thought that Loki might have fallen asleep by the time he spoke again, though the words were very faint. 

“I really like you, Thor.”

Thor tried not to inhale too sharply because he knew that Loki would feel it, but it was very difficult. His head was swimming from the happiness flooding his body. He massaged Loki’s scalp and kissed his forehead. 

“I like you a _lot_ , Loki.” That felt so good to say. 

He imagined Loki smiling as he felt a soft, lingering kiss placed on his chest. 

Nothing more was said as they drifted to sleep. 

***

In the morning, Thor smiled cheerfully when Loki wandered into the kitchen. He had found a pair of Thor’s black pajama pants to wear. They were big on Loki, even with the draw strings tied. Thor didn’t mind the sight of them resting low on Loki’s hips. 

“Good morning.”

Loki smiled and sighed. “Morning. Please tell me you have coffee.” His hair fell in choppier sections now. 

“I do,” Thor confirmed, gesturing to the coffee maker that had just finished its brewing. He grabbed a mug from a cupboard and handed it to Loki. 

Loki laughed as he took it. “There’s no way you have creamer.”

Thor thought for a moment. He looked in the fridge, giving a triumphant _hah!_ as he held up a container. It was only there from when his mom last visited, but Loki didn’t need to know that. 

“ _And_ you cooked? Thor, it’s too much. You’ll never get me to leave.” 

They ate and afterwards sipped coffee on the private balcony. Their conversation flowed easily, something that Thor loved about their time together. Everything felt natural between them. If he didn’t know better, he would never believe that they had known each other only six days. 

“You’re too trusting,” Loki commented at one point. They were discussing the fact that a condom hadn’t been used the night before. 

Thor shrugged. “I do trust you.”

“Why?”

“Why do you trust me?”

Loki huffed a laugh, like the question was silly to even ask. “You’re not hard to read. Not in a bad way, it’s actually very refreshing. But you’re very open with your thoughts.”

Thor nodded. “I don’t like hiding anything.” 

Loki looked at him with a contemplative expression. “Everyone has something to hide,” he paused before adding, “I just don’t want people taking advantage of you.”

Thor smiled. “That’s how I know I can trust you.”

It drew a small smile from Loki. He stood up. “Come on, I want to brush my teeth.” He lingered at the door, his smile turning suggestive. “And we need a shower.” 

In the bathroom, Thor followed Loki into the shower once he’d brushed his own teeth. They had to stand close in order for them to both stand below the spray of hot water, but neither minded at all. 

“So last night was very fun,” Loki said, a smile in place as Thor’s arms encircled his waist to pull him closer. They were both already half-hard. 

His hands drifted lower to slide onto the curves of Loki’s ass. 

“Yes, it was,” Thor agreed before their lips met. They kissed without the impatience of the night before, but no less longingly. Thor massaged the mounds of Loki’s arse, listening to the pleasant hums Loki made that were swallowed by their kiss. 

Using his right hand, Thor pressed against the dip in Loki’s back. He traced downward, between the crease of his cheeks to gently rub against Loki’s entrance. He felt Loki shudder in his arms. 

“Are you sore?” Thor asked. 

“Yes,” Loki said, pressing against Thor, “but I like it.” 

_Of course you do_ , Thor thought, amused. When they kissed again it was more heated. Soon Thor had Loki backed against the wall, their hands exploring one another greedily. His cock twitched repeatedly as it rubbed against Loki’s. 

He felt Loki’s hand wrap around his full erection. His hand was soapy and it made Thor’s cock slippery as he pumped. Thor groaned and tried not to thrust up. He gathered soap in his hand so that he could mirror the action. Loki whimpered, his face beautiful in his pleasured state. 

Minutes later, they were moaning as they brought each other release, their cum spattering over their stomachs. When it was done, Loki glanced down and ran a finger through their shared white mess. He kept his eyes on Thor’s when he licked it off his finger and swallowed. He did it again, but this time held it in front of Thor’s mouth. Thor accepted the gift, licking Loki’s finger clean and swallowing as well. 

The feelings running through Thor were intense. They leaned in at the same time and kissed fiercely, holding each other like they intended to never let go.

Six days. Six days, and Thor knew he was too far gone – knew that he would do anything for Loki. 

It sounded insane in his head, but it also made the most sense of anything Thor had ever thought of concerning Loki. 

Once they were out of the shower (after actually washing themselves) and dry, they somehow found themselves in bed again. They didn’t bother with clothes, their bare skin a warm invitation as they caressed each other lazily. 

Satisfaction filled Thor in every way – emotionally and physically. 

“Thor.”

“Hm?” Thor’s eyes met Loki’s. 

Loki’s fingers lightly stroked Thor’s stubble. “You’re beautiful. I don’t think people tell you that enough.” 

Thor wanted to say that if Loki was the only person who said so, then it was enough for him. Instead he smiled warmly and moved his hand to place it over Loki’s – 

Except that everything had suddenly become so _bright_. 

***

“Welcome home, princes.”

Thor opened his eyes. He and Loki stood before Heimdall. There was the bifrost to his left, glimmering luminously. His and Loki’s clothes were the same as when they were just about to venture into Roulette. 

Thor and Loki’s eyes met, where Thor found his confusion mirrored. 

“Do you...” Thor trailed off. 

Loki seemed to know what he wanted to say. “No,” he said softly. He turned back to the gate keeper. “Heimdall, what is the meaning of this?” 

“I know not what you mean.”

“I mean,” Loki continued, appearing increasingly agitated, “Have we not just returned from Roulette?”

Heimdall remained impassive as ever. “Yes, my prince. You have been absent but for six days. The allfather sent for you.”

“But then,” Thor said, feeling something ominous settle over him as he asked, “why can we not remember it?”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor and Loki work to gain back their memories from Roulette.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, Nora, for being a great beta!
> 
> Thank you to anyone who enjoys this work. It's been so fun writing, I'll be sad when it's over!

Back in the palace, Thor’s confusion only grew. He could feel the passage of time; the six mysterious days in Roulette were gone from his memory, a gap waiting to be filled. Loki felt the same way. 

“I hope it is nothing too serious that father wants,” Thor commented in the hall as they walked. 

“If it is nothing serious, then he would not have called for our early departure from Midgard.” Loki frowned as he spoke. 

Heimdall had been unable to give them information as to their mutual amnesia, saying only that he was instructed to bring the young brothers home. 

_“But did you not observe us? Can you not tell us what transpired during our stay?” Loki asked impatiently. Thor could tell that he thought he was being lied to. It made him feel uneasy to think that Heimdall, someone so familiar, could be keeping something from them._

_“Nothing out of the ordinary,” Heimdall said, “I scarcely watched.”_

To make matters worse, Thor found that even though he had hoped that Roulette would rid him of his inappropriate thoughts toward Loki, his wishful thinking had been for naught. He found Loki increasingly attractive the more he looked, even in his controlled frustration. 

When Loki walked, Thor could not help but notice a strange gait that was unlike his usual stride. Perhaps he had been injured on Midgard? However, the thought was forgotten when they approached two large doors. On the other side, Odin awaited their arrival. 

Beside him, Loki inhaled deeply, looking hesitant. 

“It will be alright, brother,” Thor offered. “Perhaps father can sort this out.” 

Loki did not appear any more assured than before, but he nodded at Thor anyway. “Perhaps.” He made a few, quick hand gestures before pushing the doors open. 

“What was that?” Thor whispered. 

“Nothing,” Loki said and walked ahead. Thor saw that he no longer walked strangely. 

“Ah, my sons,” Odin said from his chair. He sounded no different than any other day. It made Thor worry even more as to why they had been summoned early. 

“Father,” he said in greeting, trying to work up a smile. Loki only nodded. 

There was an awkward silence as Thor tried to think of how to bring up what they were all surely thinking about. 

“Well,” Odin said, “don’t keep an old man waiting. Did you enjoy yourselves on Midgard?”

“We were hoping you might tell us,” Loki. There was no accusation in his voice, but he seemed guarded in a way that Thor never understood when it came to their father. 

Odin sat up a little straighter. “You mean to tell me, you don’t know?”

He shook his head. “Our memory of our time in Roulette eludes us both.”

At that, Odin’s face wrinkled in laughter. “Oh yes, I had forgotten the name for your little game. I am afraid, however, that I know no more than the two of you.”

“But why did you send for us? Were we in danger? Are things well here?” Thor pressed with obvious concern in his tone. To his right, a raising of brows was Loki’s only show of surprise at Thor’s directness. 

“Yes, well,” Odin said as he relaxed again, “there was a political matter between ourselves and Jotunheim, but it was over just as quickly as it began. I’m afraid I unnecessarily spoiled the remainder of your time.” 

Thor and Loki looked at one another; Thor felt a shared sense of unease, but neither were willing to blatantly voice it to the king of Asgard, father or not. 

“May I inquire as to the nature of the matter?” Loki asked. Thor felt his gaze linger too long on Loki’s face, and made himself look back at their father. 

“I shan’t bore you with details of an irrelevant subject.” Odin did not speak unkindly, but his tone suggested that he was not open to further questions. 

Finally, Loki looked at a loss, his lips parted as he shook his head. “But father, this has never happened before. Why can we not remember?”

“It has been some time since you performed this particular magic.”

“That’s not it...I made sure that everything was exactly the same.”

“Loki, no magic is immune to imperfections. Not even yours.”

Thor saw the anger flash across Loki’s face, but he managed to speak before his brother.

“I am sorry that we could not come in time to help, father. I am sure the experience would’ve served us both well.” He ignored Loki’s stare. “If you would excuse us, we are both fatigued and would rest.”

Odin looked pleased. “Of course. Be sure to visit your mother soon. She has fretted about the two of you this entire time.”

***

Upon leaving the room, Thor silently followed Loki back to his chambers. He went to shut the doors behind them, but they suddenly slammed on their own, courtesy of Loki. 

“He’s lying.” Loki began pacing while Thor sat in a chair. 

Thor would have been worried at Loki’s declaration in another part of the palace, but he knew that Loki concealed his rooms from all eyes and ears, including those of Heimdall. 

Thor felt his stomach coil. He never liked to think he was being lied to, especially by two people he felt strong ties with. And if they really were dishonest, they had been so without any difficulty, from what he could tell. 

“Well?” Loki had stopped momentarily and was looking to Thor. “What do you say?”

Thor opened his mouth but nothing came out. Becoming caught in the middle of two family members was the last thing on his agenda, especially when they had no proof of the offense in question. 

“His explanation did seem vague,” Thor said, “but, brother, why? Why would they deceive us?”

“Why do you think? We must have done something...” Loki now looked in the large mirror mounted on his wall, in which both of their reflections shone back at them. “Or something awful must have happened.”

They were silent for a while, lost in thought. It was Loki who spoke first.

“Father said that not even my magic is immune to imperfection,” he said, sounding more like he was talking to himself than Thor, “I think he is blocking our memory.”

Thor frowned, wondering what could be so terrible that their father would choose to actively keep them from remembering it. “What can we do about it?”

“Well, he said _no_ magic is immune, did he not? Not even _his_.” Loki scowled as he spoke, obviously still annoyed by the backhanded insult. 

It irked Thor that father could do this and then try to make _Loki_ feel like he was to blame, like he was less skilled in seidr than he was. He suddenly wished that he had defended his brother, rather than avoid confrontation.

“Will you attempt to break his hold?” Thor asked. 

At that, Loki smiled, his expression bordering on dangerous. “I will not only attempt it, I _will_ break it.” He walked to where Thor sat and placed a hand on his shoulder, which was very unlike him. It was usually Thor who initiated any physical contact. He looked up, struck by both the determination and the affection that swam in Loki’s irises. 

“Fear not, Thor, for I have no intentions of letting us lurk in the dark.” 

Thor nodded, place his hand over Loki and squeezed. He tried not to think about how he would like to pull Loki into his lap. 

“I have faith in you, brother.” 

***

Later that evening, Thor sat in the dining hall with his friends, who had all expressed that they, too, found the situation bizarre. However, there was only so much to be said, so they had moved onto other topics. 

“Excuse me, your highness.” 

Thor looked to his left where a young servant stood. 

“Yes?”

“Prince Loki asks that you come to his rooms at your earliest convenience.” 

Thor nodded. “Thank you. I will be along shortly.” 

The young boy nodded quickly and took his leave. Thor glanced back to his friends. 

“Perhaps he has made headway,” Sif said. 

Thor nodded. “I hope you don’t mind-”

They assured him that they did not. Thor smiled, bade them all goodnight, and departed. 

***

Thor entered Loki’s room without knocking. There were open books and scrolls littering the area – on the floor, the bed, the tables and desks. Loki was sitting in a chair, his long legs perched on a table. His hair was wet, and Thor stared as droplets glided down his neck, collar bone, disappearing below the green robe that loosely draped his shoulders. 

“Did you, did you find the answer?” Thor stuttered. 

It was a few seconds before Loki rolled his eyes and flung the book in his hands carelessly to the floor. It landed with a thud, but Loki paid it no mind as he stood up. 

“No, I did not.” His robe dragged along the floor as he walked around the table, toward Thor. “I discovered something else when I undressed for a bath. Look.”

When he was close enough to Thor he turned around and let the robe fall, holding it around his hips. Thor had seen Loki unclothed countless times, but never before did it elicit the reaction it did now, a longing to touch and hold. He felt his face become warm from embarrassment and could only hope that Loki didn’t notice.

Then he saw what Loki was trying to call to his attention. Down the middle of his back were five red lines, where it was obvious that he had been scratched. Furthermore, there were light bruises on either side of Loki’s hips. He had been held tightly by someone, and Thor hated that his first reaction was jealousy at it not having been him. 

It was hard for him to form his thoughts when there were so many emotions conflicting inside him: jealousy, protectiveness, desire, confusion. 

“Perhaps you have impregnated someone? And father does not want an illegitimate heir?” 

Loki shook his head and lifted the robe back up, to both Thor’s disappointment and relief. He turned around. Thor liked the way his hair slowly curled the longer it dried, and the way it fell messily about his face and shoulders. 

“What we do in Roulette does not affect anyone but us. When we return, _we_ are the only ones with memories. Besides,” Loki paused, looking hesitantly at Thor, “it was not a woman.”

“But how-” Thor stopped himself before speaking further. He thought back to the way Loki walked upon their arrival, in a way that suggested discomfort. It made perfect sense now. Thor nodded. 

Thor did not know what to think, if any of this had relevance to Odin’s spell. Regardless, his jealousy only grew at knowing that Loki had given himself to another man during their stay. 

Loki walked away and sat on the edge of the bed. He looked tired, and the brotherly part of Thor felt frustrated at his inability to be of any use in finding a way to reclaim their memory. Glancing around the scattered texts in the room, Thor desperately wished that he knew what any of them meant. 

A long sigh overtook him and Thor slowly walked to the bed as well, where he sat on the opposite side. He looked at Loki, who seemed frail in that moment, and suddenly a horrible idea entered his mind. 

“Loki,” Thor said. 

“What,” Loki said flatly. He was leaning against a tall, wooden bed post, one of the four at the corners of his bed. 

“What if...What if you...” Thor found the next words difficult to say. Perhaps he shouldn’t say it at all because he was simply overthinking everything as a result of having so little concrete knowledge. 

Loki turned his head toward Thor with what he recognized as impatience. Thor’s foot tapped nervously. 

“What if you...were forced?” The words came out as a whisper, so reluctant was Thor to let them out. 

Those lovely green eyes widened. Loki pulled his robe tighter around himself, as though the idea itself made him vulnerable. He stood up and paced slowly; Thor could not tell what he was thinking, conflicted though his expression was. 

“You think someone was able to defile my body so easily?”

Thor shook his head. “Why would I think it easy?”

Loki was observing himself in the mirror. “Would I not have more marks? More signs of struggle?” 

“I know not,” Thor was convincing himself that it was true the longer the idea sat with him, “you could have been drugged. Heimdall may not have realized your unwillingness until later.” Until later, when Loki might have been crying, or destroying everything around him, needing Thor’s help but not receiving it.

He watched Loki’s lithe form wander like a pale, plucked lily, and his heart ached. Whatever strange longing had crept inside Thor lately, it was his little brother that he was talking to, who he was supposed to protect at all times. Loki was still the boy who had played, jested, and fought with Thor, who he turned to for advice which he too often ignored. 

“It would make sense that father would not want us to remember,” Thor continued quietly, unable to stop himself. Loki may not have the greatest fondness for Odin, but Thor truly believed that as their father, he had their best interests in mind. Rape was something that would haunt one’s mental and emotional state for a very long time. Loki would undoubtedly feel ashamed, a ruined prince of Asgard.

Loki sat on a table. He kept his eyes on the floor. “You think me just as weak as the others.”

He looked back up, saying nothing while Thor’s head shook helplessly because Loki _wasn’t_ weak. But his mind was running rampant with the possibilities of what might have happened, and none of them good. No, Loki wasn’t weak, but he was also without seidr. And if someone as large as Thor had come along – well, Thor always won between the two of them when it came to strength alone. 

“I’m _not_ weak!” Loki declared angrily, as though he’d heard Thor’s thoughts. He flung his arm up and, one by one, the chairs surrounding the table flew into the nearest wall, every one of them smashing loudly though there was only Thor to hear it. 

He felt his heart breaking a little more with each clatter, along with the chairs. 

_I’ll kill him_ , Thor wanted to say. He watched as Loki turned his attention to other inconsequential objects and released his wrath on them, one after another. Rage began to blend in with his sympathy, both at the unknown person who had the audacity to lay a hand on his brother, and at himself for not providing the protection he’d sworn so often. Thor had never felt so useless before.

Thunder rumbled outside, and a heavy rain soon followed. If Thor had not suggested Roulette, none of this would have happened. Lightning boldly flashed and wind howled fiercely, but Thor barely registered any of it. His vision was going dark, as consumed by his fury as he was. He didn’t even realize he was standing. 

“Thor!”

The voice came from so far away. 

“ _Thor_ , stop this!” 

Thor was trying, truly. He felt everything and nothing at once. His feet began carrying him, but he knew not where.

Then there was a warmth embracing him, holding him tightly. Thor nearly tore away, but there was a familiar voice that, though faint, Thor heard clearly. 

“It’s Loki. Thor, it’s your brother, Loki. It’s alright, just listen to me...”

Though Thor didn’t quite comprehend everything being said, the voice itself was such a familiar comfort. So he listened. And listened. 

***

When Thor awoke, the first thing he noticed was that he was not looking at his own ceiling, followed by another body clinging to him. He looked down to see Loki’s head on his chest, his body turned toward Thor’s as he laid against his side. Thor’s arm was beneath Loki’s neck, his hand resting on Loki’s shoulder. They had not slept like this since they were still children, but Thor felt an odd sense of familiarity in it that had not to do with his childhood. 

They were still in their clothing from the night before. Thor observed the room as much as he could without waking his brother. The events came back to Thor as he took in the numerous broken pieces of furniture. 

He inhaled deeply a few times. He had not lost control of himself in such a manner in a long time. But when he looked down and saw Loki’s lashes fanned across his cheeks, the most innocent that Thor could see him look, he held tighter and thought himself capable of losing control a hundred more times if it could somehow fix what had happened. 

“I’m sure father ate your little outburst right up, you know,” came Loki’s voice. 

Thor didn’t know whether to laugh or sigh. Last night could have actually been much worse, but it could have been better. He thought about the things he said, about Loki’s own fit of frustration. His heart felt heavy; Thor could not stop imagining a figure looming over his brother, _his brother_ , forcing himself onto Loki, caring not for any consequences other than his own pleasure. 

Thor decided that he might cry instead.

Loki twisted and leaned up on his elbows so that he could see Thor. He appeared even more tired now, and Thor hoped that he was imagining the swollen look of Loki’s eyes. 

“I am still breaking father’s hold.” 

Thor’s hand moved to rub Loki’s back, the robe soft to the touch. He thought nothing of it, as natural as it felt. It was the most contact they had had for many years, apart from the occasional, spontaneous hugs that Thor would at time initiate and Loki would endure. 

“Are you certain?” 

“Why wouldn’t I be?” There was a challenge in Loki’s voice. 

Thor’s eyes glanced downward. He didn’t know how to say that he wanted to save Loki from any possible pain if he still could. He didn’t want to see Loki’s face when they remembered.

Loki’s robe had fallen open, allowing Thor a limited view of his chest. Even now, he felt his body respond with want, and he was glad that Loki was not lying on top of him. Thor thought that his urges warranted more embarrassment than anything Loki might have gone through. 

He suddenly felt a hand on his chin and his head was lifted upwards so that he looked at Loki’s face again. From the look on Loki’s face, Thor was afraid that he had guessed the nature of his thoughts. 

“We do _not_ know what happened,” Loki said. 

Thor nodded, just happy that his gaze had been misinterpreted. His hand moved up to cradle Loki’s neck. They stayed like that for some time, observing each other. It felt both natural and odd, and Thor couldn’t explain it. He thought of how easy it would be to tug Loki toward him and pull him into a kiss. Would Loki pull away in disgust? There was surely no other option. 

Loki let go first. “There is much to be done,” he said and pulled the robe around himself as he shifted out of Thor’s reach, off the bed. 

By the time Thor sat up, Loki had a gray tunic and black trousers on. He watched as Loki repaired the damage around the room. The books and scrolls were closed and placed neatly on shelves; remnants of broken items disappeared completely, their new location unknown to Thor. 

With both the room and Loki looking more like themselves, Thor did not feel so disheartened. He stood and was unsure of whether he should leave. 

“May I be of any help, brother?”

Loki looked away from one of his numerous bookshelves. “I believe I must go to the library. You may accompany me, if it suits you.” 

Thor smiled. “I would find no greater pleasure elsewhere.”

Loki gave him a small smile in return. “Then I would have you change into something clean. Return afterwards and we will go together.”

Thor promised that he would and left for his own room. It might not be such a bad day, after all. 

***

Thor spent the day with Loki and loved it. Even if their memories were still gone, Thor could feel a renewed closeness with his brother simply through their shared purpose, a bond forged from their unique experience that no one else could understand. 

They had spent a few hours in the library. Loki would grab books, seemingly at random to Thor, glanced through them, and either hand them to Thor to add to a pile or return them to their shelf. They talked as they made their way through the aisles, getting chastised a few times for their laughter, though neither of them really cared. It felt like the night they had stayed up talking in Loki’s room again, and it was a good distraction from their underlying thoughts about the night before. Thor was all too happy to provide Loki with a distraction. 

The only problem was Thor’s inability to keep his eyes and mind from wandering to inappropriate places. Loki’s clothing was form-fitting and Thor could not help but stare as the material moved around Loki’s arm when reaching for a book. He was captivated by the elegance that Loki naturally exuded as he shifted, by the strides of his long, graceful legs, by the steady movement of his chest as he breathed. And suddenly Thor wondered how these thoughts of his were _new_. 

It didn’t help that Loki, for whatever reason, was much more prone to touching Thor than he had been in ages. He would sometimes grab Thor’s arm when something Thor said made him laugh, or lightly swat his chest when Thor teased him. Their hands brushed when Loki handed him a book (though _that_ might have been more on Thor’s part). His smiles had Thor drowning, and he didn’t know how to save himself. 

In the pauses of their conversation, Thor imagined himself taking the latest book from Loki’s hands, crowding him against the shelves and advising him to conceal themselves before kissing him hard. The thoughts made Thor’s body sing both in excitement and trepidation. He couldn’t think about it for too long, lest his desire make itself known to Loki. The embarrassment would be too much for Thor to take; would he ever be able to have the same relationship with his brother again? To look him in the eye and speak, unashamed?

Once Loki had his fill of the library, Thor helped carry the books back to Loki’s rooms. They sat under shade outside on the balcony and Loki resumed his work. It was a humid day, full of clouds though it didn’t rain, a fact that neither deemed necessary to comment on. Thor couldn’t deny the anxiety at the back of his mind, no matter how much he distracted himself. 

They spoke little now that Loki was engrossed in text. At some point, Thor realized how hungry he was. Neither of them had eaten since returning home. He told Loki that he would return shortly and went to the kitchens, where he asked that food be sent to Loki before eating himself. 

He then went to his own rooms, where Thor headed straight for the bathroom, running hot water in the tub. It took a while for it to fill, being rather large, but Thor sighed loudly when he finally stepped into the water and sat on the lowest step. The water reached his neck, and Thor could not want for anything as he let his head rest against the tile behind him. He stretched his limbs and felt relaxed for the first time since arriving home. 

Thor wished that Loki could feel this relaxed. If he was there now, with Thor...He felt his cock begin to swell as he thought of Loki sharing the tub with him. Loki, seeing his arousal and turning pink with embarrassment and curiosity as his own length hardened too. Thor imagined them kissing tentatively, almost innocently; his fingers curled around himself, slightly embarrassed even though he was alone. _Thor pulled Loki close, into his lap, and they slowly deepened their kiss._ He stroked himself languidly, biting his lip because he felt too uncomfortable to make noise. 

_Shyly, Loki reached into the water and grasped his cock. Thor moaned and moved his hand to touch Loki, who gasped and arched into his touch._ His hand moved faster, Thor’s head thrown back as he pulled his foreskin with his strokes. _“Thor, I need you,” said Loki desperately as he pumped Thor more confidently. It was Loki’s hand touching Thor so intimately, his fingers eliciting pleasured sounds from Thor’s lips._ He squeezed his shaft and released his lip from his teeth when he bit down too hard. Thor was barely aware of the blood dripping down to his chin. 

_They kissed and touched one another frantically. Loki sighed his name over and over. “I love you,” Thor murmured._ Thor was so close. He used his other hand to cup his balls and imagined Loki doing the same. _“That’s it,” Loki told him, “Come for me, brother.”_ It was in shared ecstasy and horror that Thor came hard, the word _brother_ on his tongue in as loud a voice as he dared. 

When Thor was in new clothes again, he realized that he had been gone much longer than he had promised. However, he now dreaded going back to check on Loki’s progress. Loki was excellent at picking up on Thor’s moods, and Thor wasn’t sure if he could hide this any longer. He couldn’t let it get out of hand. 

As he walked back to Loki’s chambers, Thor debated whether to just tell Loki and afterwards beg forgiveness. Perhaps Loki could even take it from his mind so that he would no longer feel plagued every time he thought of his brother. 

He knocked and the door swung open. He hardly had time to step inside before Loki was upon him in an unexpected embrace. 

“I’ve done it, I’ve found it,” he declared. 

Thor allowed himself to return the hug, happy that Loki was happy. He had to admit that it took much less time than he thought. But then, he imagined that Loki was also motivated by Odin’s comments. 

“I am glad,” he said when Loki pulled back, and he was. It filled him with pride whenever Loki accomplished something new. 

“And it’s so _simple_ ,” Loki went on, shaking his head as though to chastise himself for not having found it sooner. He led Thor by the hand to the table where a book sat open. 

Loki flicked his hand and the book levitated to his eye level. Turning to Thor, Loki moved his hands to where they each held each other’s arms just below the elbow. 

“Ready, brother?” Loki asked with a grin, the same words he uttered before they entered Roulette. 

Thor could only nod. Then Loki turned back to the book and began chanting.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor and Loki remember the events on Midgard and deal with the aftermath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was really looking forward to finishing this and now I'm sad it's over...! Thank you so much to umakoo as my beta, I hope you're willing to test read more if I write it :) Hope everyone enjoys the final chapter and thanks for reading!

Loki read the words of the book quietly, in a language that Thor couldn’t quite place. He held Loki’s arms tighter than he meant to, but he was becoming nervous from the building anticipation. He hoped he was wrong about what he thought had happened to Loki, but he really couldn’t imagine anything else that would have both Heimdall and their father so concerned. 

Minutes passed before Loki finally stopped chanting. He looked at Thor, and Thor looked at him. 

He opened his mouth to speak when everything hit. 

Thor gasped as his mind was overloaded with six days of information simultaneously flooding his conscious. He saw Loki at the bar, felt his breath on his ear. He felt a nearly violent fluttering in his chest as he pressed Loki against the truck while they kissed for the first time. Loki on his phone, in women’s lingerie ( _oh, to see that again_ ). 

One second Loki was holding Thor’s arms, and the next he was _in_ his arms, their lips meeting impatiently like they’d been apart for years instead of days. For the moment, Thor’s head wasn’t in Asgard, but in a condo where Loki’s touches had electrified his skin, his voice driven his lust. 

Loki’s hand was in his hair, a familiar touch that should have seemed foreign. Thor pulled Loki as close as he could, and Loki allowed it. Thor remembered scratching his back and pressing the bruises into his hips. He backed Loki against the table and lifted him so that he sat on it. The book had fallen to the floor, forgotten.

“Thor, _stop_ ,” Loki panted, but he parted his legs when Thor moved closer, standing between them. Thor kissed him again as though he hadn’t said anything.

How could he stop? Thor was in the shower, when he and Loki tasted and swallowed each other’s seed, when he was consumed by unwavering affection that was both old and new.

Loki’s legs seemed to tremble as they encircled Thor’s waist. Thor placed his hands on Loki’s thighs and squeezed, his mind on Loki’s strip tease. Their tongues slid together wetly, and Thor was licking icing from Loki’s lips.

His hands moved higher, just as they had on the couch. Everything triggered another memory for Thor; he was lost in his rediscovery. He pressed his fingers into the crease where Loki’s legs met his hips, intoxicated by the stifled mewl he heard. But then Loki was pushing against his chest instead of pulling, and he was breathless as he drew away from Thor. 

Loki’s hands moved over Thor’s to prevent them from traveling any farther; their foreheads pressed together and they opened their eyes. He held Thor’s wrists tightly, as if that was the only way to steady himself.

“Thor, stop,” Loki said again, a whispered plea (as though his own self-control was dependent on Thor’s). His eyes were the most beautiful thing Thor had ever seen, except that they looked too alarmed. Their lips still lingered close to each other, undeniably eager to meet again. 

He could feel that Loki was hard, and so was he. Electricity seemed to surge through him – through both of them. He leaned in just enough to where their lips touched ever so slightly, unable to resist. The grip on his wrists slackened and Loki’s eyes shut, seemingly ready to accept whatever Thor might do next. Thor remembered Loki on his back being stretched, then on his knees being taken. 

The image made something in Thor startle, his eyes widening. His awareness of himself as he was _now_ finally caught back up with himself in Roulette. 

He suddenly remembered the odd feeling of wickedness he’d experienced as he prepared to take Loki. 

To take his brother.

It made disturbingly clear sense now.

Thor backed away, feeling Loki’s hands and legs hold on for a moment before releasing him. He didn’t stop until he felt a bedpost at his back. They looked at each other, wide-eyed and breathing hard, but for a different reason now. 

Heimdall knew. Father must know (but had he _seen_?). Would mother...? Thor was starting to feel sick, the delicious desire in his stomach giving over to nausea.

He stared at Loki, his bewildered little brother, with his hair and clothes in disarray and his cheeks flushed. His legs remained spread, mourning the absence of Thor’s solid form between them, his cock still strained beneath his trousers. Thor took in a deep breath; his body craved to return to Loki’s answering heat, his heart aching at the picture of loveliness before him. 

But he had to ignore that. 

Loki did not look like he was going to say anything, so Thor took it upon himself to speak. 

“I, Loki,” he tried. 

Those exquisite, damnable legs slowly closed. “Father mustn’t know that we know.” 

Thor nodded as he backed away. “I’m sorry.”

Loki slid off the table top. “We should talk about this.” 

Still, he headed toward the doors. _Talk_? Thor could barely breathe. 

Though Loki’s expression remained troubled, he did not attempt to keep Thor from leaving. 

***

Thor walked as normally as he could to his room, nodding at the sparse guards and servants he came across. It was difficult not to break into a run. When the door was finally shut behind him, Thor allowed his hands to tremble and his breath to shake as he fought not to let loose the cry hovering in his lungs. 

His legs felt wobbly on his way to the bed. Thor collapsed onto his stomach and rolled onto his back, his gaze shifting around the room but not really seeing anything. Loki was the only thing on his mind, his numerous expressions imprinting their images in Thor’s head. 

His fingers scratched repeatedly at the quilt, seeking out something to grasp. His muscles felt...unsettled, too full of unwanted energy; he rubbed his face and closed his eyes, trying to relax even though every gulp of air seemed bigger than the last. 

What happened now? Thor felt relatively safe indulging his private thoughts away from everyone, but now his desires had managed to shame Loki as well. 

There was a knock at the door. 

“Yes?” Thor called after a moment, but no one answered. He sat up and looked to see an envelope that had been pushed under the door. Though he almost dreaded it, Thor retrieved the letter and opened it. 

_Your chambers are now concealed. No one can see or hear you._  
_\- L_

Thor’s fingers traced over the newly dried ink, written neatly in his brother’s hand. Even now, Loki was thinking more clearly than he was. Thor felt an emptiness in his chest; he already missed Loki, but he knew it was for all the wrong reasons. 

After shedding his clothes, Thor kept the letter in his hand as he crawled into bed again, under the covers. He still felt restless, but what was to be done? His stomach remained in knots, pulled tighter and tighter the longer he submerged himself in his guilt. Thor continued to stare at the letter, wanting more than anything to find Loki and make this right somehow. 

No, that wasn’t true. He wanted to find Loki and, more than anything, finish what they started. Thor knew what he’d done, knew that it wouldn’t have happened if he hadn’t suggested to play Roulette, and yet he still yearned that which could only cause them shame. 

His eyes closed and the letter crumpled in his grip. If Loki never spoke to him again outside of formalities, it was what Thor deserved. Loki deserved a better brother. 

He had been so convinced that Loki was raped; Thor was not entirely sure that the truth was any better. 

***

Thor did not allow himself to be alone with Loki. He simply did not trust himself to behave appropriately. It was taxing, however, to feel constantly torn in the presence of his brother. Whenever Loki entered a room, or left for that matter, Thor was aware even though he tried his best not to notice. When Loki came near, Thor felt his heart race and an excitement surge through him, but with it came a simultaneous sense of embarrassment as if everyone could tell how he was feeling and why. He missed Loki greatly when they were not together (which was a lot of the time). 

The first two days after regaining their memories, he had not even stayed in a room once Loki was there, too overcome by guilt and awkwardness. He received another letter the second night that read,

_They will wonder why you are altogether avoiding my company, you dolt. –L_

Thor could not help laughing at himself. After that, he conversed with Loki only in the presence of others. There were moments when they would make eye contact, if the others were paying them no attention, and Thor knew that they were both remembering. There was a tension between them and Thor would nearly reach out, the urge to touch and kiss feeling momentarily natural. One of them would look away first, but the tension was always there, at times uncomfortable with its force. 

It was not nearly enough, these small glances and conversations. Thor felt a deep dissatisfaction whenever they parted, and that was how he knew not to trust his own body to be around Loki while away from others. 

The closest that they had come to being alone (yet also the furthest) was when they shared a meal in Frigga’s private rooms upon her request. Thor was distracted the entire time, but their mother said nothing of it whether she noticed or not. Thankfully, Loki was still able to maintain his normal level of conversational skill. It was admirable, though it frustrated Thor that he couldn’t tell the nature of his admiration with the way his familial affection now bled into incestuous sentiments.

Days passed in this manner, and Thor was all too grateful when his friends asked if he might enjoy a short, three day hunting trip. He had a letter of his own sent to Loki the night before they left. 

_Stay safe during my absence. –Thor_

He wasn’t even sure why he sent it; if something happened to Loki while he was gone, well, Thor wouldn’t let himself think that far. He just wanted Loki to know that he still cared, despite his intentional distance. 

He hoped that Loki still cared, too. 

***

The trip was successful. On the last night out in the woods, with their game safely stowed for their return, Thor laughed with his friends around a campfire. Fandral had supplied them with an old, rare liquor that he claimed to have won in a bet, and Thor felt every swallow hot in his stomach. As the night wore on, Thor forgot about his recent worries for a while.

Later, as their evening was winding down, he and Sif volunteered to walk to the stream for water. 

“It is almost a pity that Loki did not join us. We wouldn’t be stumbling to fetch water were he here,” Sif laughed. 

Thor laughed less enthusiastically, but Sif didn’t seem to notice.

“Did you ever recover you memories?” The stream was in sight. 

Thor was very intoxicated, but he still hesitated in answering. He hadn’t brought Roulette up again with his friends since finding out everything.

“Yes,” was all he said. 

“ _And_?” Sif pressed. 

Thor didn’t know what to say, wary of saying too much. Every day of keeping his secret became more difficult, so the thought of sharing some of the burden was very tempting, even if he kept his answers vague. 

“I would rather we still did not know,” Thor said as they came to the stream. 

Though he couldn’t see her well, Thor could imagine the surprise on Sif’s face. 

“What happened?” she asked, more solemn now. 

Instead of answering, Thor sank to his knees and began filling the bucket he had been carrying. Shame, a familiar-enough emotion by now, returned, but with the alcohol in his veins, Thor was feeling it magnified. His whole body felt warm with it.

“I...something transpired between Loki and I, and I do not know if I can repair it,” Thor said, his throat starting to burn. He set the full bucket beside him but stayed on his knees. 

He suddenly missed Loki so much that it was physically painful. His chest felt hollow, longing for a slender, pale figure to appear before him. And Thor was _tired_ , emotionally strained from fighting his feelings, from staying away from such a familiar source of happiness. 

Sif lowered herself to crouch beside him. “It surely can’t be that bad? You’ve had disagreements before, but you always get past them.” 

Thor shook his head, frowning. “I do not know....This is different.” He thought of the future, of him and Loki always carrying on in this stilted way. Never to confide in each other, never to be close again. Even innocent embraces were forbidden now. And it was his fault. It all weighed Thor down; centuries of living had not prepared him for such unhappiness when he was accustomed to quite the opposite. 

He had to turn his head away from Sif when the tears came. 

Sif placed a hand on his back and rubbed in circles. “It’s alright.”

Thor shook his head again because it wasn’t alright, none of it. His body shook with the effort of trying to stop, and an audible sob escaped him. Sif moved closer and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, petting his head lightly to sooth him. 

It only served to embarrass Thor further, for Sif was understanding now, but if he told her everything, what then? If only she knew that Thor cried because he had known the joy of having his brother intimately, and would have him again. And again, and again. 

“I wish we had never gone,” Thor heard himself confess, his voice too broken. Heimdall surely felt embarrassed of his part as a witness, and father was obviously disgusted with them (or he would not have gone to such lengths to keep them ignorant). Mother would inevitably be repulsed by it all, her two boys, though she would never say so (and that was, perhaps, worse than if she reprimanded them outright).

They stayed like that several minutes. Eventually, Thor gently pulled away from Sif. He leaned forward and repeatedly cupped water in his hands to splash his face with it. 

“Please do not tell the others,” he said when he finally looked at Sif again. He no longer felt so tense, but he still felt empty, and his throat was sore when he swallowed. 

“I won’t,” she promised, “but Thor, you must promise me that you will try to talk this out with Loki. It pains me to see you this way.” 

“I will,” Thor said and nodded, though it was more to appease her, “thank you, Sif.”

She nodded her approval and picked up the bucket. “Come. They will be wondering where we are.”

Thor walked by her side. A halfhearted smile tugged at his lips. “They will all be sleeping.”

“It is unfortunate that you are likely right.” 

***

Loki was not at the palace the next day, and he had left no note for Thor. Though he tried not to think about it, it irked Thor that Loki would not give him any indication to his whereabouts. Did he not know that it made Thor _worry_?

He spent the day sparring. It allowed Thor to throw himself into mindless physical activity and release his stress in a more healthy way. That night, when he was covered in sweat and finally tired enough to retire without his usual restlessness, Loki still hadn’t returned. 

_It’s nothing_ , Thor repeatedly told himself while he bathed. Loki was likely out replacing the items he destroyed the night of their return to Asgard. Everything was _fine_. 

The next morning was the same. Odin requested that Thor sit and observe the most tedious meetings throughout the day, to Thor’s displeasure. It was with difficulty that Thor pretended to pay attention, though he couldn’t quite keep his tapping foot in check. 

He wordlessly eyed the faces of overly serious men in the stuffy room. Memories came to Thor of earlier days when he and Loki were both subjected to enduring what he had considered the most boring waste of time ever (to give credit to his younger self, it was still just as boring). Thor let out a long sigh, careful to be quiet enough not to attract attention from his father. 

Once it was over, Thor somehow managed to slip out without becoming involved in obligatory pleasantries. Loki was nowhere to be seen.

Without knowing of any other immediate options, Thor braced himself as much as he could and set off to see Heimdall. 

***

The gatekeeper did not cringe upon seeing Thor, though he had every right to. 

“Good evening,” Heimdall greeted him. 

“Good evening,” Thor answered. “Are all things well?”

“For now, yes. How may I serve my prince?” 

Thor held Mjolnir more tightly, a lump forming in his throat. 

Heimdall noticed his hesitance. “Loki has long since learned how to conceal himself from me. I know neither where he is nor where he has gone.” 

His hope for an answer disappeared. “Do you know how long ago he left the palace?”

“I last saw him the day after you and your friends went to the woods.”

That meant that Loki had been gone for four days now. There was nothing Thor could do but wait; he certainly couldn’t begin blindly searching the realms when Loki was clearly not worried about being found. His mood only worsened. It wasn’t even unusual for Loki to slip away for days at a time, but now? Now, Thor couldn’t help but _feel_ his absence in a way, and every hour that he did not know whether Loki was safe passed more slowly than the last. 

“Do you require anything else of me?”

The question pulled Thor from his silent worrying. 

“No,” he said as he regarded Heimdall. Thor felt guilty for his involvement in the whole thing. He wanted to apologize somehow, but there was no way unless he revealed that he and Loki had bested their father. “Thank you, Heimdall.”

***

That night, Thor found himself outside Loki’s doors instead of his own. He knocked lightly. When there was no answer, he grasped the door handle, simply holding it. He let his forehead rest against the wood and sighed, wishing for Loki’s company. 

He was surprised when the handle agreeably turned in his hand. 

Walking inside Loki’s room, Thor noticed nothing amiss. He locked the door behind him and began moving in the neat living space. There were new chairs to replace the broken ones from before. Thor allowed himself to run his hand along various objects as he went, feeling closer somehow to his brother through his possessions. 

When he had his fill of exploring the bathroom, Loki’s personal workspace (which contained a small library in itself) and his balcony, Thor came back to the main bedroom. He pondered what to do when he eyed Loki’s bed, and he struggled for all of two seconds before he began stripping down. 

Thor folded his clothes and placed them on a table. Loki’s bed was rather large, perhaps larger than Thor’s own, never being one to indulge himself less than fully when it came to material comfort. It was full of dark greens and golds. The bed was made but not in Loki’s usual orderly way, as though he had been in a hurry. 

Thor didn’t let himself dwell on the possible implications of that thought as he crawled beneath the covers and stretched his limbs. Loki had always preferred cooler fabrics, and the material felt refreshing as it caressed his bare skin but didn’t suffocate it. Lying on his back, Thor closed his eyes and allowed himself to just feel; he slowly moved his arms and legs, unable to stop thinking about how this space was usually occupied by his brother’s body. 

He felt comforted, more calm as he thought of Loki sleeping there. Turning his head, Thor inhaled, catching the clean scent of Loki. It brought a smile to his face and Thor languidly rolled over, the covers sliding lower as he raised himself toward the numerous, plush pillows. One by one, Thor ran his hands over them and rubbed his face along the lush fabrics, seeking out more of the lingering scent. 

The thought of their scents mingling should have made him worry about being discovered, perhaps, but Thor had lost himself to sensation. Here in this bed, he was warm, safe, and content. He found the pillow that smelled most like his brother and held it close, only slightly displeased that it wasn’t the real thing he was nuzzling. 

“Loki,” he whispered as though he was heard, “please, come home.”

***

Thor awoke the following morning feeling well-rested for a change; it was a very nice feeling. When he remembered where he was, he closed his eyes again to prolong the pleasant drowsiness of his body and the comfortable warmth of the bed. He inhaled, searching for that scent again, but it had been too mixed with his own during the night to stay as it was. It was a little off-putting, but not enough for Thor to make any motion to leave. 

That is, until Loki himself spoke. 

“What an unexpected surprise, brother.”

Thor’s eyes opened and sought out the source of the voice. Loki stood at the foot of the bed with his arms crossed and a little smile in place, smug though it was. 

And before he knew what he was doing, Thor was up and crawling quickly toward Loki, who didn’t have time to evade the following embrace even if he had wanted to. Thor was on his knees as he held Loki tightly.

“Brother, I’ve missed you,” he said warmly, glad that Loki appeared whole and healthy upon his return. It made him recall the times on Midgard when he would see Loki after only a day, but a day had felt so long to have to miss him then. It was no different now. 

When he leaned back, keeping his hands on Loki’s shoulders, Loki no longer looked smug, but perhaps uncertain. 

“Where have you been?” Thor asked. 

At that, Loki backed up, just out of Thor’s reach. “I could ask you the same question.” 

Thor’s brows lowered in confusion before he remembered himself. Loki had just found him naked in his room. He sat further up on the bed and drew the covers over his lower half, embarrassed by his own self-consciousness and hating it. There had never before been a reason to hide his body from Loki; it felt unnatural. 

“I just, the doors were unlocked,” Thor tried to explain. 

“The doors won’t open for anyone else,” Loki told him with a look that said it should have been obvious. He glanced at Thor’s folded clothes. “The room is not concealed when I am not present, so I hope you’ve done nothing...incriminating.” 

Thor’s face heat up at the suggestion. He shook his head. “No, I only slept.” _And smelled all your pillows, and pretended that the one I was holding was you._

“Ah,” Loki nodded. “How fortunate.” His tone didn’t match his words. Was he disappointed?

“I should leave,” Thor said, clutching the throw as he tried to decide how to go about redressing with Loki in the room. 

A small laugh left Loki’s lips. “Very well, brother. Run from your troubles. Here, I promise not to watch you dress as you go,” he taunted and turned around, making a show of placing his hands over his eyes. 

Thor huffed as he scooted off the bed. “I’ve not run from anything.” 

“You’ve done nothing else since we remembered.” 

“ _I_ have been trying to be careful,” Thor argued while he pulled on his black trousers, “You said yourself we cannot let father know, _and_ you disappeared for four days without any word-”

Loki turned around swiftly before Thor had put on his tunic. “Without any word? Do I suddenly answer to you now?” He asked and smiled unkindly. 

Thor hated when Loki spoke to him condescendingly. However, he did not wish to be at odds with his brother, so he remained calm as he answered. 

“No, but I worried for your safety.”

“Oh yes,” Loki’s smile split into a grin, “I was to stay safe during your absence. Is it not early for you to start giving me orders, your highness?” He began walking toward Thor, a smugness returning to his features. “In fact, it was usually _you_ following orders on Midgard, was it not?”

“Loki,” Thor said, an attempt at a warning. Except that he stood paralyzed with his tunic clenched in his hands as Loki sauntered closer. 

Loki stopped a few feet away. “What is it, Thor? You don’t want to admit the truth?” He huffed a laugh. “And they call me silver tongue.”

Thor stood straighter. “I need not admit anything when we both know what happened on Midgard.”

The way he was looked over by those green eyes was unnerving, the same way they did in the cafe from across a small table. “And what _did_ happen on Midgard?” 

When Thor didn’t answer, Loki smiled knowingly. “Perhaps you would rather show me, instead?” 

Thor was sure his face was red. “ _Loki_. What happened...never meant to.” He looked down, unable to maintain eye contact. “But I wish you would not taunt me so. I cannot express enough how sorry I am to have shamed us both-”

He was interrupted by Loki’s laughter. He watched longingly as Loki walked away. “I’ve no use for your self-righteous apologies, brother. Nor am I ashamed of my actions, so you may consider yourself unburdened, by all means.” He continued to chuckle at his own words as he paced the room, coming to a stop to observe himself in the mirror. 

Thor slipped the tunic on and stepped forward. “How can you speak of this with such triviality-” He stopped himself, replaying Loki’s words in his head. There was surely something he was not comprehending. 

“What do you mean, you are unashamed?”

When Loki looked at him again, Thor recognized the mischievous glint in his eyes. “Of all the times we’ve entered Roulette, why do you think this has only just happened?”

Thor sighed. “I do not know.”

Loki moved his hand, and Thor’s breath was caught in his throat when his brother suddenly donned the same red Midgardian lingerie that he had sent Thor pictures of. And try as he did, Thor could not stop looking at his legs as he walked away from the mirror. 

“I’ll tell you. It has never before been a mutual desire. Until now.” Loki spoke with the same careless tone, but Thor knew he was aware of the way he carried himself. 

Thor unconsciously walked backwards when Loki came his way again. The room became darker with a flick of a pale wrist, the daylight no longer seeping in through the windows or balcony doors. 

“Mutual,” Thor repeated, feeling thickheaded as it became harder for him to focus on any sense other than visual. But then something clicked and Thor’s eyes widened. “You mean to say that you’ve felt this...before?”

The candles mounted around the walls became lit, and Loki’s body appeared almost ethereal in the dim firelight. “Why do you think I created the game?”

Loki created the game a few centuries ago. That meant that Loki had been struggling with the same desires as Thor for far longer. It triggered a whole new set of questions in his mind: was that why they really hadn’t played in so long? Is that why they had grown apart? Had Loki been dealing with feelings of rejection? Did the feeling of shame pass with time, or had Loki never felt that at all?

His back had hit a wall and there was nowhere for Thor to go, nothing for him to do but watch and wait as Loki nearly finished closing the space between them, stopping just before their bodies touched. 

_Beautiful_ , Thor thought. He felt his old, familiar affection mixed with this newer, frightening need. It was overwhelming. But one thing was for certain: Thor’s heart pounded wildly through it all, for he loved Loki impossibly more than ever before and all he wanted to do was show it. 

“You said you’ve been careful,” Loki said, his voice low and soft, “why?” His lips curled upward even as he spoke. 

Thor hoped he looked as exasperated as he felt. “You know why.” 

Loki’s answering grin confirmed the truth of Thor’s statement. He lifted his hand to barely caress Thor’s cheek.

“Brother,” Thor sighed and closed his eyes, trying not to lean into the touch, “I do not possess the strength to fight you today.” 

“Then leave.” The warmth of his hand vanished. 

Thor’s eyes opened, but Loki no longer stood before him. Turning his head, Thor found Loki on his back in the bed. 

He stood, torn between what he felt he should do and what he wanted to do. However, Thor had always been one to listen to his heart over his head, and so he chastised himself as he joined Loki in bed. Not too close, for Thor still did not trust himself. He lied on his side, facing his brother. 

“You remain here,” Loki commented, not looking at him. Thor studied his profile, his straight nose and his lips as they moved, as they smiled. “You are quite the assortment of contradictions today, brother.” 

Thor could not deny that. They had not been alone since that fateful day, and now it seemed impossible to him to leave Loki’s side even though he thought he should. He wanted _something_ to happen; Thor simply couldn’t stand the thought of leaving this room to have things stay as they currently were. 

“You said we should talk about it,” Thor said. He wanted to ask Loki to clothe himself normally again, but felt that it would only be taken as a source of amusement. It was a challenge to look only at Loki’s face, as lovely as it was. 

“So talk.” Loki brought one of his legs up, keeping it bent while he stretched his arms above his head. In the soft lighting of the room and the suggestive outfit, every move made by Loki seemed more sensual than it was, perhaps, meant to be.

Then again, given what he now knew, it was _just_ as sensual as it was meant to be. 

Thor swallowed, ignoring the heat building in the center of his body. “I’ve never seen you behave as you did before.”

Loki’s smile was rejuvenated. “How do you mean?”

“I mean, so forward. And so...teasing.” His embarrassment warmed his face and chest. 

“Of course not,” Loki said. He bit his lip and turned his head to look at Thor, his eyes glinting. “You’ve never exactly been subjected to my advances, have you?” 

At once, Thor felt heavy in a way, weighted by jealousy at the thought of Loki behaving in a similar manner toward others. His face must have given it away, for Loki’s expression lit up. 

“Are you displeased, Thor? That I’ve shared my body with others?” He turned on his side, and Thor couldn’t help but admire the slight curve of the corset, and the way stray locks of wavy, dark hair fell across his cheek. 

“It is none of my business,” Thor muttered. 

“True,” Loki agreed, “but you’d like it to be.”

“It matters not what I want,” Thor countered, hating how rehearsed his own words sounded. 

Loki silently gazed at him for a short while. Thor was beginning to feel uncomfortable when he finally spoke again. 

“And what of what _I_ want?” 

That gave Thor more pause than anything. He had not thought that Loki would want anything other than what Thor wanted – to maintain some level of decency in their relationship in order not to embarrass their family any further. Yet Loki had admitted that he first felt this attraction eons ago. He had, in fact, placed them in Roulette before to see if this very outcome would result, without Thor ever suspecting anything strange (he made a mental note to ask Loki about this in more detail later). 

And here Thor was, poorly hiding his struggle and barely surviving after a few weeks of knowing the same feelings. He felt weaker than he had in a long time. 

Loki suddenly seemed much closer than a moment ago. Without thinking, Thor brushed his hair out of his face. Loki placed his hand on Thor’s neck, pressing his fingers just below his jaw. 

“Your pulse is very fast.” His fingers slid gently down Thor’s throat, over his Adam’s apple. “ _Talk_ to me, Thor.” 

Thor’s gaze kept shifting from Loki’s lips to his eyes. He felt finger tips peel back the collar of his tunic to trace along his collar bone. 

“Do you love me?” he asked quietly. He reached to thread his fingers through long, black hair. 

Loki frowned as his hand moved across Thor’s shoulder. “Of course.”

Thor pulled him closer still, and Loki made no protest when their foreheads touched. Their proximity was driving Thor mad, but he couldn’t help himself. Loki shut his eyes first, then Thor. 

“Even if I were to leave now?”

For all of Loki’s calm demeanor, he now held Thor’s arm tighter than he probably meant to. 

“Yes,” he answered, their noses brushing, “leave now if you must, and I swear to never speak of this again.”

There was no animosity, no underlying threat that Thor could hear, just a breathlessness that had him hardening helplessly. It was a plea for Thor to make up his mind now that he knew where Loki stood. 

Thor was afraid of how his hand shook in Loki’s hair, of how much effort it took to keep his breathing even. Even if he were to leave, he and Loki would still know the truth – and he didn’t think he would ever feel satisfied with expressing only a facet of his love. It simply wasn’t in Thor’s nature to restrain his emotions like he had done for the last several days. 

Loki did not stop himself from being tugged forward and kissed tenderly. Even with the lightest brushing of lips, everything felt surreal. For the first few moments, neither of them seemed able to kiss properly. They both breathed with a shakiness that exposed how overcome they were by the situation, lips moving in an almost mechanical way as though just this contact was far beyond where either of them expected to ever be. 

It was so unlike their kisses on Midgard, where they had been driven by the exhilaration of barely knowing each other. Midgard felt far away and everything felt new for Thor again. Here, he did not question the extent of his affection. The warmth that had been inspired by a sense of shame was giving way to a sense of excitement at how forbidden their actions felt, spreading throughout his body in waves. 

Loki’s hand touched his cheek where it lingered momentarily, stroking the stubble there before sliding into Thor’s hair to cradle his head. They slowly regained enough control of themselves to kiss more naturally, and steadily became reacquainted. A wanton moan escaped them when their tongues tentatively met, making Thor’s whole body burn as though seized by fire. 

Or lightning. 

The sound of light rain fell upon Thor’s ears, and even as he hoped that no one knew the reason for the unexpected shower, it aroused him that someone might. As he ran his hand down Loki’s back and over the corset, Loki pressed their bodies together, encouraging his exploration. 

“Did you miss this, Thor?” he breathed. Thor felt a shudder at his question, for neither had business in missing any part of what they were doing.

“I’ve thought of little else,” he answered, surrendering to honesty. 

He reached lower, finding Loki’s exposed arse and kneading his fingers into the flesh there. Loki moaned again, the sound familiar but no less addicting. He stopped kissing Loki’s lips to kiss the corner of his mouth and moved downwards to his chin. Loki tilted his head up, gasping in the neediest way as Thor continued beneath his jaw to his throat, adorning his skin with licks and nips. 

Thor pulled Loki’s leg forward so that it hooked over him. He raked his nails up and down a smooth thigh, drawing them across gently at times and harshly at others, and reveled in the sighs it drew from Loki. He felt Loki’s hand move beside him and then his tunic was gone, along with Loki’s corset. 

Loki reclaimed his lips and arched against Thor, using his leg to keep them close. He briefly wondered why Loki didn’t remove all their clothing but said nothing of it – perhaps it was to draw it out longer. He had been fond of that sort of thing on Midgard. It felt so delicious to have their warm, bare skin touching, to rub against each other again that Thor doubted there was much he could find the motivation to give voice to. 

The rain fell harder as Thor rolled onto his back and brought Loki with him. Straddling him, Loki rolled his hips down; they both voiced their pleasure at the friction, muffled by their kiss. Loki continued the motion and ground against Thor slowly, deliberately. Thor held his hips and wished for a mirror so that he could watch Loki move. 

Breaking away, Loki moved to leave his own trail of open, wet kisses across Thor’s jaw line and neck. He nibbled Thor’s ear lobe and Thor turned his head to make it easier, having forgotten how much he liked that. He ran his hands up Loki’s back and scratched down sharply, making sure to replace the healed marks with fresh ones. Loki gasped, the sound wonderful so close to Thor’s ear. 

He slid his hands down and onto Loki’s ass and, grabbing the firm mounds, guided his brother’s movements in an attempt to make him go faster. Loki caught on and appeased him, panting while Thor rolled his hips upward to meet him halfway. The friction of their clothed cocks was both immensely pleasing and frustrating. 

Suddenly, Thor felt his wrists being pulled upwards and above his head, where they lay close together. He tried to move them but there was no give despite the lack of a physical restraint. Loki kissed him briefly, and when he pulled back Thor could see the playful smile on Loki’s swollen, red lips. He was taken aback by the loveliness of the firelight flickering across his fair skin.  
Loki began kissing his way down Thor’s chest, his hair cascading around his face to sweep softly against Thor’s skin. Thor let his eyes fall shut, his lips parted and breaths shallow. His length strained to be free of constriction as Loki teased him, touching him with only his mouth. 

Loki’s tongue was warm and soft against one nipple, his teeth sharp as they tugged the other one. Low moans were all Thor could offer as Loki licked down his stomach before nuzzling his thighs, seemingly in no hurry. 

Finally, Thor felt his trousers slide down his hips. He opened his eyes and lifted his head enough to see that Loki was pulling them off by hand rather than magic. Thor’s cock was full and leaking, and his brother eyed it with a hunger that made him twitch, eager for any attention. With the pants gone, cast aside carelessly, Loki licked his lips and pulled Thor’s foreskin down to reveal the head, smooth and red. 

He kept his eyes on Thor’s as he knelt closer to it, as he stuck out his tongue to lap up drops of his seed. The action tore a desperate cry from Thor, the sight of his brother crossing another line of intimacy as his cock disappeared beneath his lips. Thor kept watching, but soon the sensation of being encased in Loki’s warm, wet mouth was too much, so he let his head fall back. He felt his hair stick to the sides of his face, trying not to thrust up while Loki earned the name of silver tongue. 

“Loki,” he groaned, receiving a hum in response, the vibrations sending him waves of pleasure. His lust only deepened at being at Loki’s mercy like this, unable to move, unable to stop the breathless sounds he made while Loki noisily pleasured the most intimate part of Thor’s body. 

Eventually, Thor knew he was on the verge of spilling, but he didn’t want the pleasure to end so soon. 

“Loki, please, not yet,” he said, hoping his meaning was conveyed, slightly embarrassed by the desperation in his tone. 

Whether it was conveyed or not, Loki pulled off and leaned back, the green of his eyes practically gone. He waved a hand and Thor could finally move again. He quickly sat up and reached for Loki, easily pulling him into his lap. Their lips met fervently, and Thor felt heady as he cradled Loki’s head with one hand and slid the other over the straining material of Loki’s last piece of clothing. He felt the bulge of Loki’s cock and continued, intending to tease over Loki’s entrance. 

However, Thor’s fingers found a wetness that was too much to have been only precum. Loki squirmed in his grasp as he explored further, pushing the soaked fabric aside to feel a warm, soft pair of lips. 

Thor gasped, pulling from Loki’s mouth. “You never told me...you had...”

Loki leaned in so that their lips brushed delicately as he spoke. 

“A cunt?” he said, accompanied by a quiet laugh. “Does it please you?”

Thor ripped the material until it finally fell away from Loki entirely, his cock bobbing toward his stomach. “Yes. Has anyone ever...?”

“No,” Loki answered, a little breathless as Thor’s fingers hungrily slipped between the slick folds, eagerly spreading the wetness around. “I have pleasured myself, though, many times.” Loki mewled when Thor found his clit and rubbed it in a well-practiced, circular motion. 

The image of Loki touching himself like this was nearly enough to send Thor over the edge. “I would enjoy seeing that,” he admitted, his face burning in embarrassment at his boldness, yet he was all the more compelled by it. He moved his hand to press three fingers inside Loki at once, unthinking of whether he should have worked up to it. 

From the way Loki cried out and began moving, it didn’t seem to be a problem. 

The noise made by Loki eagerly fucking himself on Thor’s fingers was nothing short of obscene, and it pleased Thor to no end that he was the first to experience Loki in this manner. The wetness coating his hand hand was perfect, as was the hungered, frantic kiss that ensued. Thor had only to keep his hand steady, letting Loki control his pace, his moans becoming more wrecked and more frequent. 

After a while, Loki slowed his movements and pulled away to murmur into Thor’s ear, “Do you think of me when you’re alone?” 

“Yes,” Thor admitted, catching Loki’s meaning. He bit his lip before asking, “Do you?”

“I always do,” Loki purred, “ _brother_.”

The inappropriateness of that single word elicited such a heightened arousal from Thor – perhaps like none he’d known before. He gave something like a growl as he wrapped his free arm possessively around Loki’s waist. Pulling his brother even closer and inhibiting him from moving on his own, Thor began driving his slick fingers into Loki much faster than before. Loki’s gasps filled the room, the only thing he could do other than hold onto Thor, his nails digging harshly into broad shoulders. 

If it was painful, Thor did not register it. His mind told him only to please, to mark and possess the wriggling body in his arms. He licked up Loki’s lovely neck, tasting just a hint of saltiness. That wouldn’t do; he would see Loki sweat more than that. Thor kissed his way back down the skin and sharply bit him just above his shoulder. 

“ _Ah_ , Thor,” Loki sighed, and Thor could feel him attempt to arch his back even more. He licked the mark lovingly. 

“Is this what you imagine, brother?” Thor rumbled, moving his fingers faster still. Loki whimpered, the two of them shuddering in one another’s arms from Thor’s words. 

“Almost,” Loki answered breathlessly, moaning when Thor bit him on his shoulder, “though I usually envision your cock spreading me open.”

Thor momentarily lost his breath and accidentally drew blood from Loki’s skin. He added another finger to Loki’s heat, thrusting in and out with relentless force. Unable to do anything but take it, Loki wrapped his arms around Thor’s shoulders and buried his face into his neck. 

It wasn’t long until he was absolutely sobbing Thor’s name. The wind outside howled right along with him. Thor could feel Loki tighten around his fingers, and within seconds Loki was pulling back, trying to free himself. But Thor held him fast and watched his brother’s beautiful features as he was overtaken by pleasure. Loki’s head fell back as he came, his inner walls tightening and throbbing around Thor’s hand wonderfully. 

He continued his assault, though more gently, until Loki weakly placed his hand on Thor’s arm and squeezed. 

“Enough,” he said. 

Thor knew when to listen. He withdrew his hand and brought it to his mouth, holding it still to let them both see the evidence of their actions. His fingers glistened with Loki’s cum; they watched each other as Thor began licking them devoutly. Loki caught his breath for a few moments before leaning forward and helping Thor complete the task (delighting Thor again with his willingness to taste himself). Their tongues met at points between Thor’s spread fingers, making their cocks strain against their stomachs. 

Finally clean, Loki swatted his hand away so that they could kiss freely. They remained melded together as Thor slowly repositioned them so that Loki was on his back. Their hands roamed along one another and they kissed with a reverence that could only exist with their familiarity. On Midgard, Thor had felt the excitement of a new lover, an infatuation that had not fully matured. Now, a similar excitement still pulsed through him, but there was a sense of completion as well, an endless contentment that had just been unlocked. 

It was a little frightening. 

Reaching down, Thor positioned himself at Loki’s entrance, hovering there. He felt Loki’s ankles on the back of his thighs, pulling lightly in encouragement. 

“What are you waiting for?” he murmured after a minute. Thor leaned back a bit so that they could see each other’s faces. 

He didn’t know how to explain that he still felt a little overwhelmed, that once they did this, there was absolutely no way to go back. Of course, Loki seemed to guess his thoughts without him having to say a word. 

“Oh, Thor,” he cooed, holding Thor’s hair out of his face and rubbing his cheeks with his thumbs. Another time, he might have teased Thor for his sentimentality, but right now he waited patiently. 

Thor closed his eyes and inhaled deeply; he turned his head to kiss one of Loki’s palms. “Just tell me you’re certain,” he said and looked at Loki again. 

“I was certain then; I am certain now,” Loki answered readily. And he probably really was, given that he’d had centuries of contemplation. Thor would simply have to catch up. 

He kissed Loki deeply, feeling nimble fingers thread through his hair and caress his scalp. His chest swelled with fondness. When Thor found Loki’s entrance again, he didn’t hesitate before pushing in. 

Loki moaned and turned his head to the side as he accommodated Thor’s size, just as wet as before and somehow more tight. Thor pressed all the way inside, nearly euphoric as he did so. Damn whatever Heimdall or father might say. 

Thor set a steady rhythm of deliberate thrusts; he didn’t want to feel hurried. Loki was pliant beneath him, seeming to enjoy the leisurely pace as well. His eyes were glazed over and half-closed, his hair was tousled, a sheen of sweat was starting to appear on his forehead. Thor could not think of anything more exquisite. 

Loki seemed to feel Thor’s gaze and turned his face toward him again. More than anything, Thor wanted to tell him his thoughts of how gorgeous he was. It had been so easy to give such flattery on Midgard, and was maybe the one thing that Thor lamented. He wasn’t sure how his praises would be accepted by this Loki, who dealt with others in secrets and, often times, a facade. 

“Come here, brother,” Loki entreated in a low voice, and Thor obeyed, whispering his name before joining their lips. He hoped these actions spoke to Loki of Thor’s regard, for he’d heard the words enough times before. 

They continued rocking together slowly, their kisses pausing frequently to allow for sweet murmurs, for eager moans. Thor found this drawn out adoration of one another to be more intense than if he’d taken Loki quickly and roughly like he still wanted to – there would be time for that later. 

When he knew that he could not resist releasing for much longer, Thor raised himself enough so that he could reach between them and stroke Loki’s weeping cock. Loki’s legs tightened around him and he moaned loudly. Thor buried his face in the crook of Loki’s neck. 

“Thor, Thor, don’t stop,” he whimpered, one hand digging marks into Thor’s back and the other tugging a fistful of his blond hair. 

“I won’t,” Thor said, unable to keep from speeding up as he chased his pleasure. He breathed in Loki’s scent, a mixture of clean, sweat and sex, and found it intoxicating. “I love you,” he added breathlessly, the phrase slipping out before he could catch it. 

“I know,” Loki answered, his sex urging Thor to go faster as it tightened, “I’m close, so close, brother, _brother_ -” Loki sobbed as he came for the second time, spilling warmly onto both of their stomachs. The way he clenched around Thor’s cock had the effect of Thor following seconds after, filling Loki and uttering his name. 

Thunder rumbled while they held onto each other, Thor placing light kisses all over Loki. He would almost swear that Loki was purring under his attentions, his grip on Thor becoming lax. Pulling out of Loki, Thor frowned when he was pushed back and Loki lazily made his way off the bed to stand up. He walked to his bathroom, stretching his arms above his head as he did so. 

“Why don’t you run us a bath?” he called over his shoulder. 

Though Thor had wanted to simply lie in bed for a while, he stood anyway and went to do as he was asked. 

***

The bath was a good idea. Loki allowed him to run hot water, which Thor preferred, but Loki generally enjoyed luke-warm baths. The tub was very large, but it could have been tiny for all the space they ignored, instead crowding one another. 

For a while, neither Thor nor Loki said anything. They did not keep their hands to themselves, though their touches were no longer sexual. Thor rubbed the back of Loki’s neck and Loki stroked Thor’s cheek. Sitting a step below Thor, Loki’s shoulders were kneaded as he ran his hands along Thor’s legs. 

Their silence was an easy one, allowing them to relax and prolong the feeling of being sated. Turning around a while later, Loki took Thor’s hand and gently kissed his knuckles, his palm, and his fingers. Thor could not help gathering Loki in his arms to kiss him again, and Loki welcomed it. They shared lazy kisses for some time before Thor finally broke their silence. 

“What did you drink?” As Thor had waited for the water to finish running, Loki had drank a clear liquid from a small, glass vial. 

Loki smiled. “I seem to have made a mistake earlier. You _definitely_ believe me to answer to you now.” 

Thor grinned and kissed him again. “I was only curious.” 

“If you must know,” Loki said casually, “I would rather not become with child.” 

Thor stared at him in disbelief. “You might have carried my child?” 

“Might have, but not now,” Loki confirmed. Thor held him more firmly, the possibility of impregnating Loki both frightening and appealing. 

“Why did you not tell me?” 

Loki laughed. “I thought it poor timing-”

“No,” Thor shook his head. “Before this. You stopped being open with me. Why?”

“That is unfair, Thor. I was _very_ open with you just minutes ago.” He laughed at Thor’s gaping mouth, then repositioned himself to sit sideways across Thor’s lap and rest his head on Thor’s shoulder. 

Thor pet his smooth, wet hair. “I would know truly, brother.”

Loki hummed for a moment. “Why did you stop being open with _me_?” 

As Thor thought about it, he realized the validity of Loki’s question. He had pursued personal interests just as much as Loki. He did not enjoy how it made him feel, like he had failed Loki in being a good brother (though in light of what they’d just done, being a good brother was still debatable). 

“I did not mean to,” Thor said quietly, “but it will be that way no longer.” He kissed Loki’s temple. “I swear it.”

He felt a kiss on his neck. “Sing me to sleep.” 

“The bath is not meant for sleeping,” Thor said and chuckled. He did not know where the request came from; Thor had not sang since they were still boys, except for when he would join in the songs of soldiers. 

“Then carry me to bed, brute, and sing to me then.”

***

Thor could barely stand not being around Loki, and Loki seemed to be of the same inclination. However, Loki was always the voice of reason, and made sure they devoted enough time to the activities they usually did, even if it meant being away from one another. 

When they were together in one of their rooms, which kept them hidden from Heimdall, all of the pretense faded away and they could hardly keep their hands off each another. Once they were satisfied, they would stay up and talk until they fell asleep, and Thor always thought he felt impossibly happier than the time before. 

Eventually, they began spending more time together in public, slowly enough so that it seemed like a natural rekindling of their old closeness rather than a sudden, inexplicable occurrence. Thor still had to remember to behave appropriately around others, but he sometimes brushed Loki’s hair from his face or let an innocent touch linger too long. It could feel tortuous, but no longer in a draining way like before. Thor had never felt more invigorated. 

***

“You are quite pensive tonight,” Loki observed. 

They were lying in Thor’s bed tonight, having just had their fill of physical pleasure. Now they lied together, sated for the moment. 

“It is nothing,” Thor said, stroking Loki’s unruly hair. 

“Liar,” Loki retorted. He traced patterns on Thor’s chest. There was no rain outside; Thor had become much better at controlling the storms when he and Loki were concealed. Loki thought that Heimdall had probably started to suspect something by now anyway, but as long as their father said nothing about it, Thor held on to hope that he didn’t. 

Thor sighed. “I cannot remember the last time I was so content.”

“And yet you frown.” Loki never let Thor only give him a minimal answer. 

“I only worry. I know not how long this feeling will last.” 

They both knew what he meant by that. How long could they keep this going without making it overly obvious? What happened when Thor took the throne and was expected to marry? Those and other questions plagued Thor these days. Were it up to him, he and Loki would leave, explore the nine realms as brothers and lovers – but that was but a boyish notion. 

“We have knowledge of only two things: past and present. You cannot live in fear of the future, lest you become deterred in all endeavors. It will not serve you when you wear the crown.” 

“You are right as ever,” Thor nodded and smiled, “though I would rather wear you.”

Loki smirked, shifted closer and kissed him thoroughly. Though they had rested for only minutes, Thor’s body responded with interest as it always did. Loki pushed him on his back and crawled over him. Thor held him tightly, already starting to forget their conversation when Loki broke their kiss and spoke in his ear. 

“Then I will cloak you, brother, and shield you from the uncertainty of what lies ahead. For all of tonight, you will know naught but my body and name.”

When their lips met again, it was everything that Thor wanted, and he held onto Loki – his brother, his happiness – like he never meant to let go.


End file.
